


Dawn Is a Meeting of Fire and Ice

by Thetimehascome



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Adventure, Alternate Universe - Avatar & Benders Setting, Domestic Fluff, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, I mean enemies is a strong word but there's a lot of distrust, M/M, War
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:47:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 31,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23680297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thetimehascome/pseuds/Thetimehascome
Summary: When people meet chief healer of the united water tribes Kim Hongjoong, they often called him “fiery”. Passionate, fearless, and daring, Hongjoong has served 7 grueling years saving more lives than anyone thought possible in this driveling war and he’s sick of it.Upon first impression of General Commander Park Seonghwa of the fire kingdom, people say his presence is like ice. Frigid, collected, steadfast, Seonghwa has lead his men with strength and determination. But if his 8 years fighting has taught him anything, it’s that no end to this war is coming soon.Both are tired of bloodshed- and willing to lay down anything for a peaceful end. But with the pettiness of royals at play, and a long nasty history between their nations, neither know if it’s possible.When a small glimmer of hope presents itself, they both take a leap into the unknown.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa, Slight woosan and yungi
Comments: 74
Kudos: 184





	1. The day begins to melt.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to my Seongjoong fic. I have a lot planned out and I'm pretty good about finishing my works so don't worry about that, although I don't promise a great uploading schedule. I love avatar the last airbender and I adore Seongjoong and ateez as a whole, so I'm excited to write a fun adventure/romance about both. Also if you're worried there will be no Yeosang or smut in this fic, worry not, but you will definitely have to wait a bit so settle in. Anyway hope you like it!

Seonghwa moved through the battlefield like a writhing snake. 

His movements were smooth and his limbs graceful, his eyes sharp enough to sting. The carnage around him burst alive with fire and water collapsing into each other, twisting around leaving giant puffs of steam. Hot and cold swirled in the air, the ground beneath his boots both burnt and soaked. Cries of triumph sound out from his right, groans of the pained to his left. But none of it seemed to touch him, his clothes pristine in a world bathed in mud. 

He was waiting for the right moment, the swell in the air that would carry him all the way. Right as a burst of fire charred three men before him, a spike of ice cut through it to strike the attacker down for the final time. In the mix of opposite energies Seonghwa stood, mind tranquil as his arms began to spin together gathering force in the palm of his hands. Just as the sun fully settled below the horizon, he released. Thunder cracked across the sky, and a bolt of blue lightning blazed through the air, straight into the opposing commander’s heart. Seonghwa lifted his hands, sizzling with electricity, and brought the rest of his energy to the ground. It struck a multitude of the water tribe’s warriors, and scattered the rest to fumble through the night without a leader.

His men pushed forward to press as many fleeing men to the ground as they could before he gave the signal for them to hold. His voice rang out across the scorched earth, halting the men’s actions like a shot in the back. He allowed himself one big sigh before he moved on, taking in the bitter tang of dust and blood in the air and releasing it back out. He straightened his broad back, and moved towards the nearest injured warrior.

“Move it men! Take any wounded you have back to camp and patrol the new border.”

Once again chaos surrounded him, ants crawling and picking up any scrap of man on the ground to try and save or bury. He got to work as well, determined to do what he could before he arrived back at his tent and had to plan a whole new attack strategy by morning. He trekked across the dark land, casting a small flame in his hand to see by as it flickered warm light across his midnight colored hair.

He picked up one unconscious body by the back, wary of the shards still melting into the man’s skin. The ice spear looked so beautiful, gleaming in the moonlight like a galaxy shot straight through a man’s flesh. Seonghwa felt an odd jolt of Jealousy, for this man would most likely make it through this and then return home a wounded hero. Maybe trauma would haunt his dreams, maybe his shoulder would ache till the end of his days, but it would be over. The blood a memory, the torn flesh mended.

He walked quickly towards the medical house, dropping off the warm body into trusted hands. Seonghwa felt a bit of bitterness at his helplessness choke him, frustration welling up in his throat. There was nothing he could do to heal a body, no technique he had to save a life that was already close to death. His powers lay in pure destruction, his infamous lightning stabbing across the battlefield with precision unheard of before his time. 

It had taken him many long grueling years to develop such an iron grip on his technique, many days wasted in concentrated meditations and practices that ended in a fizzle. But he was nothing if not determined, and by the time he turned 22 he had first displayed his technique on the field. He was but a captain at the time, only 4 years in the trenches but already a bit of a legend to the new recruits who heard tales of his impenetrable demeanor and fierce fighting style. That day when “god himself struck the enemy from the sky” certainly cemented his legend.

But soon he would build a separate reputation for himself as he rose through the ranks, one of a man with a face of ice and a heart of gold. His compassion for each man under his rank was well known by now, as well as his distaste for any undue ill treatment of even enemy combatants. The most talked about incident was the time a young San violated his decree to treat their prisoners of war with care. The prisoner had killed San’s good friend but a few days before, and San lost it at the sight of a face ingrained in his nightmares. Seonghwa spared him none of the ten lashes given to any violator. San took them with his head held high, and swore to him he would be better.

It was because of that day that Seonghwa appointed San as his second in command, and he still believes that was the best decision he’s made in his lifetime. Under his direct tutelage and care, San has flourished into a fighter he would have at his back any day, and a man he would trust with his soul. Through him he met Mingi and Jongho, two promising young fighters who he grew to respect just as much. Jongho’s quiet conviction and Mingi’s brash vigor added much needed color to his life, and it’s clear to all that they form his most trusted circle.

Thus it was no surprise that those very men were waiting for him when he got back to his tent, all having already removed their armor but looking unwashed. He clucked his tongue at their sweaty bodies, but Mingi just grumbled that they couldn’t all come out of a battlefield looking like an untouched prince. Seonghwa just sighed and sat on the cushion set aside for him, sinking into the soft feathered surface with a groan he wouldn’t let escape in any other company. 

“Well that could have gone worse.”

San rolled his eyes and scrunched his feline eyes in a fond look.

“That’s a funny way to say everything went near perfect.”

Seonghwa just shook his heavy head, a never ending pressure pushing on his eyes.

“There is no perfect here, just minimizing pain. We may have killed more than we let go but with their superior healers it’s hard to know if our total casualties won’t end up being more. What I wouldn’t do for even one of those head healers.”

He looked out onto his friends, each outlined in the lantern light that was glowing calmly in the center of their circle. The shadows looked deep on their faces, sinking into their pale flesh just below every bone. Jongho’s eyes were steady but dark, darker than they seemed yesterday. Perhaps it was a time to give at least one of them a break…

His thoughts were cut short by a snort out of Mingi, the boy scrubbing at his sweat matted hair and giving a smile like a grimace.

“Well not everyone can have someone like that Kim Hongjoong huh? We’ll get by like we always do.”

San piped up as well, always eager to chip in on such needed optimism. 

“Yeah we still definitely won this one Seonghwa hyung, thanks to you and your planning!”

Seonghwa snapped back instantly, expression neutral but tone curt to those who knew him so well. 

“We did it together. Us and our men, especially those who just lost their lives.”

Sans mouth tightened at the corners, his eyes lowering to stare at his muddy white tunic and his hands twisting the dense fabric into knots.

Quickly Seonghwa regretted his words, sorrowful that it was San who had to take the brunt of his rare show of frustration. He reached out and gripped San’s hand in his, rough fingers rubbing a soothing rhythm on his skin. 

“I’m sorry I snapped like that, forgive my impatience. The king has sent orders for a bigger push to the west, even greedier now that most of the earth Kingdom is under our rule. He does not see the bodies, nor are the weeping mothers pounding on his chest asking for justice, and that keeps him cruel. I am just tired San, and I despise admitting it, but I’m not sure I see an end to ti all.”

The silence following his statement was cold, and he let it simmer in the air. Suddenly San wrapped his hand with his own, and he knew that was the only answer he would get. So he put one arm around Mingi and another around San while scooting closer to Jongho, and let it be. 

…

Kim Hongjoong could not believe the nerve of this fucker. 

Not only did this man storm into HIS medical tent demanding treatment for a simple cut when there was a man with an arm almost burnt off already on his table, but he had the gall to ask if ‘this boy’ knew where Head Healer Kim was so he could be treated by him. Well Lieutenant commander or not, no man stepped foot into his medical center and made demands without the treat of death breathing down their neck.

“Oh I’d let him know you're here, but guess what? He doesn’t like to see weak punks who don’t know the very word RESPECT, so maybe you can fuck off instead.”

He watched the red creep up the bulking man’s face, his body going from leaning casually to towering over Hongjoong’s small stature. 

“Excuse me? I’m here to see Head Kim and when I find him I will let him know that he needs to search for healers with better manners.”

The man was obviously unprepared for the bony finger jabbing at his heavily decorated chest, his step back more out of surprise than the force of the push. Hongjoong stepped forward to crowd in, letting his eyes slide shut until they were sharp slits. 

“You are excused, Lieutenant. As the head healer here I will not tolerate this attitude in MY tent. Now leave or wait until I have time to heal such a minor wound.”

With that he spun around, showing his back to the frustrating man, and began to work his healing water into the charred flesh of the man before him. The liquid glowed a soft emerald color, sinking into the cracks and closing up the weeping skin. Some men like to joke that they never prayed for an angel in blinding white, but rather a hot tempered man with hands of glowing green.

After he was done healing the ashen looking man, he dunked his hands in the bath of disinfectant, screwing up his nose at the potent scent that stung his nose and eyes. He let out a sigh and turned to see if the lieutenant was still there, relieved when he saw the waiting bench empty. He quickly scampered out to go back to his private tent, the sun already hanging low in the sky, lighting up his bright red hair until it burned on his head. 

He reached his destination and pulled back the plastic blue fabric to reveal his two most trusted companions already waiting for him, one with a devilish grin and the other with wide but disapproving eyes. 

“Kim Honjooooong!” Wooyoung crowed, “I heard you dressed down a poor lieutenant to his underwear and spanked him for his insolence right on your desk.”

Hongjoong didn’t even have to smack him as Yunho helpfully did so for him, and his large hands hurt a whole lot more so take that Wooyoung! His small victory didn’t last long though as Yunho quickly turned to him, his blond locks splitting apart to reveal two very impatient eyes.

“Joong no one said you spanked him, but they did say he was cursing your name all over town over some insults. Please tell me you didn’t really call him an idiot.”

Honjoong chewed his rosy lips, debating his options carefully, and decided that Yunho would know if he said anything but the truth.

“No I didn’t say idiot, I said weak punk. And I know I have a habit of getting on peoples nerves but he was very rude!”

Wooyoung had already lost himself to laughter, big gulping peels of it spreading across the tent. Yunho shook his head but couldn’t stop the smirk from curling at his lips.

“What did he say that was so bad Joongie hyung?”

Hongjoong hummed and sighed, knowing that he would probably be the one holding his friends back from an outburst once they heard the story. Readying himself for some quick blocking, he let them know what had just occurred.   
“He came in when I was treating a patient with severe burns to demand that I lead him to Head Healer Kim so he could have his shallow scratch treated by the best.”

And so all good humour evaporated from the room. Wooyoung and Yunho were some of his best healers, and they all had spent many hours together trying to save every soul they could. To come in and interrupt an important procedure, and then demand to cut ahead of those in greater need? A grave sin. One that Hongjoong knew Wooyoung and Yunho would not be forgiving anytime soon.

“He what?!” Wooyoung stood quickly, his small hands curled into tight fists. Yunho didn’t stand but a storm passed over his face, his mouth tightly pursed. Hongjoong knew he had to be the voice of reason here, despite it not being his strongest suit.

“Please calm down both of you, you already heard that I gave him a good scolding. You know you can count on me for that right?”

Wooyoung paused, and Yunho seemed to consider these words, mindlessly staring at HongJoong’s painted nails where they are pulling at the frayed strings on the end of his black pants. There was even a green gem on Hongjoong’s pinkie finger from a set that Wooyoung gave him as a gift a long while back. Wooyoung had said he had thought of Hongjoong when he saw the nail art accessories, and the fact that Joong was on his mind cut much deeper than the pretty gleam on the gems.

“Okay I do trust you with this. I’ve been reamed out by you in the past, and I can rest easy knowing that man was cut down to half the size he was before. Pompous ass.”

Hongjoong beamed at Wooyoung, and then at Yunho as he nodded in agreement, feeling happy that he would have less trouble to deal with after all. He loved his friends as family, but sometimes he felt like a single mother on his last brain cell trying to restrain a powerful puppy and a bratty kitty from creating absolute chaos. Matched with his own short patience and flare for dramatic, things could get messy fast. As reluctant as he is to admit it, perhaps they actually got it from him and their 5 long years together. 

They had met on a particularly bloody day, the dry air of summer damaging the water tribe’s power reserves more than expected, and the latest battle had been more close to a massacre than a struggle. There were still firebenders in the area, and the other healers were huddled to the side, waiting for the all clear before they wandered the field for those who could be granted more time. Hongjoong had taken one look around the sparse field filled with bodies, and started marching forward.

He heard chatter erupt from behind him until a shout of his name lashed out towards him, the head medical woman demanding to know where he was going.

“To those who need me.” He replied completely brazen, “To those who have risked their life. And if I have to give a small risk myself to reach them then so be it. I will not let any person die before my very eyes.”

Then he whipped around, crunching through the hardened ground, and knelt down to the first body he found.

“Wait!” 

He flipped around to see a young boy running up to him, looking determined despite the slight shake of his hands by his side.

“I’m coming with. Let's stick close together so we can fight better if it comes to that.”

Hongjoong just nodded, and went back to closing the man’s wound. He startled when he felt another presence to his right, only to see the promising young medical assistant they called Yunho working beside him. When Yunho felt his gaze on him he simply gave him a tight smile and kind eyes before popping the cork on his medical water jug and starting his task. 

That day they worked for three hours tirelessly, knowing they were the only help these men would get. They quickly agreed to focus on closing the worst wounds to give those in dire need a better chance at survival before the others would come to help. Finally the all clear was called, and the field was filled with all the medical workers on deck, buzzing around as they healed who they could. But that day was never forgotten, not for those three or the soilders who they saved. Soon it was widely known that when you could count on no one you could count on Kim Hongjoong, fearlessly helping the wounded long before others would dare. He got some bumps and scratches for it, including a heart wrenching moment when Yunho was burnt from the elbow down, but it was nothing that would stop him from leading them out there time and time again.

Wooyoung, Yunho, and him grew closer and closer, until they could worm underneath each other's armour the way no one else could. Any other person calling Hongjoong a prudish grump? You’d better watch your back. But wooyoung? Well that was him on a good day. Eventually the whole unit knew to ask Yunho first if Hongjoong had had his morning coffee yet, and to beg Wooyoung to use his charms if one really needed a favor out of Hongjoong. 

In turn Hongjoong learned what songs Yunho’s mom sung him to calm his quivering body, and that if you had a comment about Wooyoung’s weight then you better shut up about it. They tested each other’s boundaries until they found themselves a comfortable place in each other. Their relationships were symbiotic, bringing out the best growth in each other. Hongjoong supported his boys even when he didn’t know how to stand, and he knew he always would. But there was one question he could never protect them from, one answer he couldn’t bear to lie about. 

“Joong-hyung do you think this war will ever end?”

He just sighed, long and hard, and clung onto Wooyoung and Yunho’s hands, eye’s clenching against the reality around them. 

  
  



	2. Secrets Held Tight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In a VERY rare burst of inspiration I have been writing a lot and thus have completed the second chapter of this. I guess I'm really excited about this story because I love adventure fics and there isn't enough out there. I hope you guys like it, and please don't hold me to this schedule forever because it simply can't last too long. Still hopefully I can get the most out of it while I can!

Seonghwa had come a long way to find this library. 

Tucked away along the cobblestone path in a small town off the Coranto coast, the place was unmarked and shuttered down. It looked more like a squatter's quarters than anything, but Seonghwa had a good tip that it housed much more than it looked. He knocked gently, squinting against the sudden light as the door squeaked open. A bulky man stood in front of him, a scrutinizing look on his weathered face. He simply gave Seonghwa a nod, and moved away to let him step in.

The inside was a stark contrast to its dilapidated outer layer, it's colorful shelves and calming lantern light like a pearl inside a tough oyster shell. He shed his dark pea coat and placed it along the rack, sparring the attendant only one more glance before he began his exploration of the area. His boots clacked along the hard wood as he took deliberate steps out of sight. 

He reached down and took out the paper that was smoothly folded in his pant’s pocket, rereading the lines he had already memorized.

_ Go to the third door on the cobbled path, it’s windows boarded shut tight. Knock 3 times gently and wait long past politeness. Then go to the third shelf on your right and reach up to the top row. There are two books to find, one by a man named Atomer and the other by a woman named Johui, which should lie right next to each other. You may only take one at a time. _

Seonghwa searched each book along the top row until gold lettering on a red bound book caught his eye. On its spine was Atomer, and he quickly reached up to snag it. However he noticed an odd absence next to it. The book that should be beside it was missing, no Johui in sight. He scoured the shelf up and down, but it was clear that the book was not present where it should have been.

His mind was spinning with the possibilities this absence implied. There were two options: either the librarian had misplaced the book or another was searching for the same matter he was. From what his contact could tell him the chances that anything would be out of place is low, but the other possibility was both deeply disturbing and intriguing. If someone else was on the hunt then he could find a valuable partner, but adding in another person was taking more risks then he had planned. 

Seonghwa moved on to bring the book up to the counter at the front, debating what he could ask from this man who held so many secrets in his grip. In the end he kept his mouth shut, not willing to risk his welcome here by asking questions in a quiet place. He took one more glance around at the packed bookshelves and the vast room, wondering how much forbidden knowledge must be held on its dusty shelves.

He grabbed the book once the man looked to be done, and gave him another parting nod. As he went to grab the run down door he heard a deep voice speak up from behind him, causing him to turn around and stare. 

“Good luck.”

The man’s grim face never changed, but Seonghwa figured that he must have some desire to see his improbable mission succeed if he bothered to speak at all. Seonghwa offered him the tight smile he gave his men before battle, and pushed out of the door into the cold night air once more. As the door closed he tucked his prized book closer to his chest where it lay under his coat, and walked away without a sound. 

…

Hongjoong had hardly been able to believe his ears when the librarian told him the book he wanted had already been taken a few weeks ago. He had almost risked it all by blowing up at the stone faced man before he calmed himself down. He made sure to keep a cool head as he stepped into the warm air of the place once more, preparing himself for the worst if the man said it was still gone. He didn’t even look up past his small bow in greeting before he headed straight to the section he wanted. When his eyes landed on the letters Atomer he felt a leap of joy, going up on his tippy toes to grab its bottom corner. When he looked again he noticed that the hole was wider than the space for just one book, and he noted that Johui was nowhere on the shelf.

Suddenly nervous, he bustled to the front desk and waited impatiently for the cataloging to be over. He felt paranoia creep up his spine, a chill of eyes on his back even if he knew no one was there. Who could be out there searching for the same thing? Who was this stranger who held the same hope he did? There were so many questions and so little avenues to gain their answer. 

Hongjoong wasn’t entirely sure he was ready to find out anyway. It seemed stupid to just ignore what potentially could be a partner that he hated to admit he kind of needed, but to risk revealing his identity when holding onto this forbidden object seemed just as foolish. It didn’t help that he was no random man off the street, and as much as he resented admitting it, he had quite the reputation and position which forced him into a very precarious place indeed. Being Head Healer had been a great honor and gave him many opportunities, but it restricted him as well. 

When he arrived back to his hostel he immediately took out his notebook to begin taking notes on the book’s content, hoping to get a clearer picture of where to go and what to do on his quest. He opened the blotted green cover to reveal the first page with the title spelled out in bold slanted letters:  _ The Last Known Avatar.  _ His heart beat a little faster just looking at the paper, his mind recalling the decree his chief last made: If anyone was caught searching or speaking about the avatar they are to be banished to the small desert island off the earth kingdom’s west coast to die. 

He wondered if anyone else found it curious that both the Fire Kingdom and the United Water Tribes seemed to fear the idea of the avatar a whole lot for two nations who stated that the last one died 25 years ago. Since then both nations have claimed they have a rightful ownership of the continent, arguing that since there is no peacekeeper it must mean the only answer is war until a victor is crowned on the heap of bones of his enemy. What a pathetic claim for two rulers who have not seen a drop of blood fall to the ground. Hongjoong was too tired of the stench of blood to sit around and wait for a clueless leader to pull his head out of his ass or watch as one nation crumbled to the ground. 

As he turned the next page over his eyes grew wide at a piece of paper nestled in between the front flaps, fear once again making him pause. But Hongjoong never let his worries hold him back, so he plucked the fresh paper out and unfolded it with steady hands. The writing was fresh, the ink still shiny where it lay on the page, and the handwriting had a precise curl. He took one calming breath in, and read its contents carefully. 

_ Dear my unknown companion, _

_ I was shocked to say the least to know there is another searching for the same answers as I. While I figured the librarian would give me nothing on your identity, I thought it wouldn’t hurt to see if you are willing to respond when I reach out. I am not sure of your position nor your true quest, but I do know there is really only one reason you would have picked up this book, and I think we both know it is not simple curiosity. Not with so much at stake for any who is found holding on to this.  _

_ Some may call me crazy, but I find a bit of comfort in knowing there is someone as insane as I. Out of your mind enough to hope I suppose. If you are willing to discuss your theories on this matter and perhaps even more, put your letter in mail box 104 at the post office located by the cloth stall. I will await your letter if it shall come no more than 1 month from the 5th of may.  _

_ Regards, _

_ Your friend in insanity. _

Hongjoong was a little baffled by the prose of the letter and its slightly outdated drawl. Who ended a letter with regards anymore? Did he perhaps befriend a man no younger than 64? Well despite that, Hongjoong would have o see if he needed more knowledge after reading this book and then he would decide if it was worth it to reach out. If there was still much he was lacking than he supposed he had little choice than to brainstorm with this man who indeed seemed as crazy as himself. 

So he read all night, pouring over the yellowed pages of the green book and noting down anything of worth to try and understand where he should go to find the long abandoned home of the avatar. By morning's light he had collected his thoughts and pieced them together with the other book’s information, but was still missing several key clues. While he vaguely understood that he needed to find the compass of the last avatar’s son to point him to his last resting place, he couldn’t figure out where the compass would be. Finally admitting defeat on solving it all on his own, Hongjoong sat down to write his letter. He pulled out a fresh ballpoint pen and fervorously scrawled across the blank white page. 

_ Dear Mr. Batshit, _

_ I suppose I am grateful as well that there is a person who is as crazy as me, although I’d argue that looking for an end to this stupid war is far from an outrageous thing to do. If you want to know my goal then there you have it. I also am unsure of your status or opinions, although I assume you desire a similar thing considering your disregard for the strict rules.  _

_ As for the information, I am aware of the compass and its importance, but its location alludes me. I have a lot figured out about where the resting place should be, but it is still not narrow enough to check out locations one by one. I cannot go to every mountain range on an island with a tip that glows green in the sunrise. Thus I am willing to share if you are as well, and I hope that two minds, no matter their mental state, are better than one. Send your letter back to the post office mailbox and I will come back in another month. _

_ Hear from you soon, _

_ H. _

Hongjoong gathered his stuff in his small knapsack again, and prepared to head out to the post office first thing. As he gave his key to the desk his mind pondered the bizarre situation he has put himself in. Here was Head Healer Kim Hongjoong scurrying around in the dead of the night to commit high treason and then gained an unexpected penpal in crime. He shook his head and opened the door to the street. He squinted against the harsh morning light and hustled along in hopes of keeping the witnesses to a minimum. 

When he was close enough to see the mailboxes gleam in the sunrise he paused and settled down to look around. When nothing suspicious popped up and no one appeared around, he pulled a little water out of his bottle and froze it around the paper. He then shot water out of the tube, pushing the letter through the air and straight into its designated slot. Thank god for all those dumb competitions Yunho used to insist on, all three of them shooting smaller and smaller targets to see who’s the best shot. 

He lifted himself up and once again leaned into the shadows to look around. If anyone was going to confront him, he’d rather it be in this small town than the high court. Once again however, it seemed as though nothing of note was around. He debated trying to gather information about the owner of the mailbox from the post office worker, but decided that he couldn’t afford to leave any impression himself. 

So he turned away, crisscrossing across back alleys until he reached his horse still tied to the general store post, patting his girl’s mane until she was willing to bear him for the long trip home. He started along the path and pulled his hat down to cover his face and red hair as best he could. As he set off the sun was finally passing the horizon, and his mind was turning with possibilities and the bittersweet taste of hope. 


	3. Take a Leap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back again! Already! This is honestly outrageous to my other fics lmao, I'm sorry to my other readers. I think I've just been watching too much ateez and Seongjoong content... I mean Seonghwa saying he would "eat a spicy chip for Hongjoong any day"? God the romantic tension is killing me. Also I love adventure fics and I want them to hurry up and start this journey! This is the last of the other boys we will see for a while, but it is also the start of our real trip. Will you be my friend? 
> 
> P.S. My outline for next chapter just reads BICKERING AND A BOAT, so please prepare yourself.

Seonghwa approached the black alley with caution, his hood over his head and his face masked by blank white plastic. The world was silent as he reached into the crack underneath a brick laying on the back part of the rundown home next to him, and he looked around the empty alley warily before tucking away the paper he just retrieved in his coat. He slinked back down the road once he was done, moving swiftly before his image could be spotted in the yellow streetlights. 

He climbed his horse and began his journey right then and there, preparing to move on through the night until mid-day as that's how long it will take for him to return to his headquarters. Habits were too dangerous to keep as his appearance is much too notable to be lingering in a small town regularly. The journey was tiring and long, but he knew this response would be worth it. He had already returned here three times before to send and receive letters, and the progress this exchange has given him was much greater than what he achieved on his own. 

He didn’t know who it was on the other end of this dangerous communication, but they seemed to bounce off each other in perfect tandem. While Seonghwa was stuck on the numbers and patterns his partner was overwhelmed with wild possibilities and imaginative questions. But once Seonghwa provided a solid foundation of ideas, the other was able to expand Seonghwa’s mindset to see dots that were too far out there to be seen with only neat numbers. 

While his pen pal listed all the options based on the personality of the past avatar and the patterns they have seen so far, Seonghwa was able to eliminate many of these ideas using logic and geography: it couldn’t be Sinkal because the climate wasn’t right to produce the green light at sunrise that is observed in nations around the equator, and it couldn’t be Kalimora because it was too far away to fit with the time the avatar reportedly took to reach his final destination. Using their two specialties they moved rapidly through the map, until in the last letter he sent he had stated that he had figured it out: it was the Fuja mountains on the Hakuri islands.

The territory was neutral in the war, for as long as both sides allowed it to be. It was close enough, in the right climate, and most importantly the Avatar had been there before. The chances that he would choose a place he never visited seems odd, and this was the only place that matched it all. Seonghwa had thought about taking off on his own with no response to his mysterious partner, but after they had worked together to such success it felt foolish to let them go. Besides, he would rather have a friend than an enemy when taking on a task that might lose him everything he’s ever known. 

So he sent the letter three weeks ago asking if they wanted to take this on together, and now he holds the response in his coat. The idea of actually seeing his shadow person seems weird now, the thought even making him slightly nervous. While he had no expectations in the beginning, throughout these couple months he felt like he grew to learn someone, even respect someone. Perhaps it was a symptom of sharing a secret that he knew neither of them had told even their closest friends. But depending on this response it would be time to come clean. 

Speaking of confessing, Seonghwa was fairly sure he had just been caught. Standing outside his horse's stall were his three little brothers, San, Mingi, and Jungo, looking stern as they leaned against the rough wood doors, squinting against the noon light. He nodded to them and sighed, movin to put his horse back in her place in silence. The stares on his back however felt quite loud, the slight distrust in the eyes of those he cared for most was a heavy burden even for a man who carried as much as him. When he shut the panels and turned back towards the rest of them, he kept his voice calm and reassuring, hoping to shut down some of the investigation to come.

“I promise I will tell you all everything, but before I can inform you of the complete truth I need to do one task in my tent. I will call you all in when I’m done.”

San moved to speak but Jongho beat him to it, causing a pout to appear on his slender face.

“Hyung we will allow you your task because you’ve never broken a promise. But please be prompt because this suspension is grating on me.”

Perhaps it was odd timing but Seonghwa felt such a rush of pride looking at his boys, their spines straight and taking no excuses, but their faces calm and ready to listen. They had come a long way from the hotheads he met so long ago. Unable to resist the urge he reached out and ruffled both San and Jongho’s hair, a small smile cresting his face. He ignored the ‘ugh’s behind him and walked straight to his tent, determined to know what he was about to get himself into and then talk it over with the people he trusted most.

He sat down on the soft cushions in his tent and pulled out the note, the rasp of paper sliding against paper loud in the heavy silence.

_ Dear Crazy Bastard, _

_ You sure live up to your name. When you told me you were deranged I should have listened the first time. But I guess I’m strong enough to admit that I wouldn’t have gotten as far if I did. I want to deny you, denounce you as insane for even asking if I want to go searching for the most forbidden object in the damn continent with a total stranger, but I suppose that would be massively hypocritical because my answer is yes.  _

_ Sanity be damned, if our letters have shown me anything it's that I’ve met a good match in some random man who happens to be just my kind of mental. Once we get this compass we’ll still need to figure out how to use the thing, and I have a good feeling that might only work if we put our two twisted minds together. I’ll meet you at the agreed location of Margaret's saloon in Karmal city, but I need three weeks to be able to leave, so I will show up on the 25th of August. I will see you soon, Mr.Unknown. _

_ Regards~, _

_ H. _

Seonghwa wasn’t even aware that a smile had crept onto his face while he read until he heard a pointed cough from outside and remembered the need to hurry up. He read it all again to memorize the important details, and then took in a deep breath and called in the other boys. As they filtered inside, Seonghwa prepared the argument that he had been perfecting in his head every night for the past two months, trying to convince himself when the doubts permeated his thoughts.

But now looking at them he realized he wouldn’t be trying to persuade them, he would be telling them. Because he doesn’t need any more convincing than the scars on their arms and the bags under their eyes. This war has crawled on for so long sometimes he thinks people are scared for it to end. After the blood is cold on the ground, and the bodies have sunk deep back into the earth, will it all feel worth it? Seonghwa doubts it, and he wonders if people keep fighting because they don't want to admit that it was all a fluke. 

Or maybe they have simply forgotten how to live any other way. Life seemed to move to the beat of battle these days, swaying back and forth like the tide lapping away at the grains of sand on a beach. Its continuation into the next day seems like a given, how could it go any other way? And so they fought again, and he watched as a new mark was carved onto his friends body, just one more almost.

But he wouldn’t sit safe any longer. Before he had thought that climbing ranks and being the strongest leader he could be was the best way to protect his men, but now it feels like all he can do is give them one more day. And he was tired of waiting around for the final moment, the climax of this whole war, because 8 years is too long to count on next year being any different. So he would risk it. Risk it all- for these men beside him.

“I have been in contact with a like minded individual, and the reason I have been leaving frequently is to retrieve their letters and plant some of my own.”

San’s smile was wicked, and Mingi had a sparkle of excitement twinkling in his big eyes. Jongho just raised one amused eyebrow. Suddenly Seonghwa felt surrounded by a pack of wolves, each boy leaning in just a little closer as Mingi half-yelled at him first.

“Hyung you should have told us you found a person of interest! Me and San had a bet on if you would express a single ounce of romantic intent before you were 30. I hope you're proud to know I won!” San quickly began to whine, grabbing on to Mingi’s sleeve and giving him a good shake.

“Hey! I thought he might be asexual or something, I don’t know I was being open minded! You used to call him amoeba behind his back since you thought he would self-reproduce!”

Now Mingi was half stuttering half keening, both boys bickering while Seonghwa wondered where it all went wrong. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to Jongho who had a calm but sweet expression, face gently lit in the dark tent. 

“Congrats hyung, really.”

Seonghwa sighed, trying to gather the patience to sort this mess out. He pinched the bridge of his nose and pondered the option of kicking them all out and disappearing one day, but then he imagined their faces when they realized he was gone, and he quickly waved the thought away.

“Boys please, PLEASE. I am sorry to disappoint everyone and lose someone a… bet on my love life, but this person is not my partner in love. They are my partner in crime. I am about to take off on a long journey to commit what is probably the most dangerous task of my life, and I am joining with this person to do it.”

The silence was a stark contrast to the screaming just a second ago, all eyes once again fixed on him, but now each set as wide as possible. Seonghwa took a steadying moment, and then continued on in a lower voice.

“I am going to retrieve the Avatar. Me and this person have collaborated on finding his compass, and I think we have a solid idea of where it is. On the 25th of August I will go, and San will lead while I’m gone. We have only one real shot of ending this constant war, and I’m going to take it.”

He let his words sink in, a long pause lingering as he watched disbelief to anger to fear pass through on all of their faces. It was Jongho’s voice that came out next, more shaky than he had heard in a long time.

“Hyung you  _ can’t. _ This isn’t just a crime, this is a rebellion. You are the ground General of the entire Fire Kingdom forces, you are Park Seonghwa the man who controls God’s mightiest weapon, and you are our brother. You are risking more than your life, your risking all you mean to others.”

Seonghwa felt that statement sink in his stomach like a stone, but he knew it was just another weight he would have to carry on his journey. He closed his eyes tight and let out a long gust of air. When his eyes opened again, all the boys knew it was over, his irises holding that steady cold fire he wore before each battle. 

“I know I am risking it all my dear friends, but I am risking more by letting this slow death grind us into dust. Sometimes the safest thing to do is to take a leap.”

No one said another word, but slowly Mingi moved to wrap an arm around Seonghwa’s middle, burying his head deep into his shoulder. San moved to do the same, and even Jongho held him so tight he could barely gather a full breath. He just wrapped as much of them as he could in his own grip, and held on until he couldn’t remember how much time had passed. 

....

Hongjoong had come to the bar dressed in all black with a long cloth covering his face. The place was dimly lit but well attended, the smell of sweat and mead thick in the air. He wasn’t the most inconspicuous, but he didn’t need to hide completely. In fact he was here to expose himself. It was hard to believe that fact, and he felt crazy anytime he remembered, but there was so much riding on this journey that in the long run he knew this wasn’t even the worst risk he would take. Still, when Yunho and Wooyoung had discovered that he didn’t even know his mysterious pen pal, oh god they had flipped out. He can still hear Wooyoung’s screechy voice ringing in his ear.

_ “What do you mean you don’t even KNOW this man you're running away with to do crazy crimes! Kim Hongjoong- no don’t look at me like that you don’t get the respect of the hyung title right now- you are normally the smartest of us all, but right now you have lost your goddamn mind if you think we are letting you do this!” _

_ Yunho looked sick, his normally cheerful face twisted into a deep grimace. Hongjoong knew it wouldn’t go over well, but it was turning out worse than he feared. _

_ “Hongjoong I have to agree with Wooyoung. You are not only risking your position and your life, but even your goal if this man ends up turning you in and not helping you at all.” _

In the end it had only been his famous stubborn nature that had pushed him through their constant arguing and worrying. They all knew this was a huge opportunity, but also a massive liability, and he couldn’t blame them for their objections. In the end it wasn’t their anger or their worry that cut the deepest, but their sadness. On his last week there they slept every night together, their warmth curled around him as he drifted off. It was a precious memory he would carry around with him now that they are out of his reach for the first time in 6 years. 

Eventually he couldn’t even look into their eyes, too overwhelmed by their desperate edge. They looked at him in mourning, like his body was turning cold in their arms. But he gripped them just as fiercely, determined but still scared to let go. He confessed on his last night with them that he was actually deeply afraid of losing more than he could bear. They didn’t say a word, just squeezed him tighter. A lot of hugs and a few tears later, he had headed off, leaving his superiors with the excuse that the mental trauma was too much and he needed a break. It wasn’t a rare practice, but he had never taken a trip away, so rumors spread around him even as he ignored all of them. At least he knew Yunho would lead well in his place.

The bar around him stilled, and an instinct told him that he was no longer in solitude. Sure enough as soon as he looked up a man in a long cloak sat right across from him, face mostly covered by a black cloth mask and hood. His body tried to tense but he forced it to relax, not letting any emotion show through his body language. They both sat in silence, sizing up their not so distant partner. Hongjoong had to admit he was both relieved and unsettled by seeing his crazy pen pal, relieved that he showed up but unnerved by his presence.

His theory about his writing partner being 64 was clearly wrong, his large looming body and fresh eyes obviously young. But it was more than just that fact that scared him, it was this man’s posture. It was military straight, weight balanced on the front of his body, perfectly ready for a lunge forward. This man was a fighter, and Hongjoong had a feeling he was not one that used water. Suddenly the man jerked his head towards the door, and got up to head out the exit without looking back.

Frustrated but out of other real options, Hongjoong made his way into the alley with him. The man scanned the perimeter and moved deeper, until they were in a dark secluded strip behind the saloon. They once again stared each other down, both men still as they were only left with the sight of each other. Tension ran down Hongjoong’s spine along with a bead of sweat, even the sun’s light seeming to dim between them. When the man took a step forward Hongjoong rapidly released his water, and whipped it around to pin him to the brick wall. 

The man didn’t make a single sound as he was slammed, only his eyes slightly narrowing gave away any change at all. Hongjoong still didn’t know who he was dealing with, but he was beginning to suspect he was getting much more than he bargained for. Hongjoong’s voice was steady, but his fingers curled around his pants tightly.

“Who are you really? Show me your face  _ partner. _ ”

For a moment Hongjoong didn’t think the man would respond, until he heard a light scoff.

“We are both hiding for now. I think it is unfair to demand what you will not give.”

Hongjoong gritted his teeth. This man couldn’t know, but Hongjoong was sure he had a lot more to lose than he did, and revealing himself to a Fire Kingdom fighter felt too foolish. 

“Well I do have you pinned, if you haven’t noticed. And I need to know what I’m dealing with before I move forward.”

As soon as he was done speaking those dangerous eyes narrowed further, and suddenly a burst of fire burned away all water trapping the man’s body, with a great puff of steam rising above them like a cloud that dipped down to earth. Hongjoong jumped farther away but he didn’t need to bother, the man hadn’t moved an inch. As his deep voice rang out again, Hongjoong could do nothing but stare. 

“We will need to go through a lot more danger than this if we are doing this task together. We are risking  _ everything  _ and I didn’t come here to half ass the journey. If you are too big a coward to take this leap of faith with me then we should leave things here, because we can’t be partners without a basic level of trust.”

When Hongjoong remained still the figure turned, and began to take silent steps away from the back alley. 

Hongjoong thought about all the arguments he fought with Yunho and Wooyoung for this, all the tears they already shed so he could take this risk. He thought about the men he wasn’t able to save, the burnt soil left barren after a battle with all the green long gone, the smell of iron and puss he never washed away no matter how long he scrubbed. And so he launched forward, a small hand wrapping firmly around his partner's arm. When the masked figure turned to face him again, he gripped the edge of the cloth wrapped around his head, and pulled.

His partner’s eyes widened for a moment when his face was revealed, clearly taken aback by the face now clear in his view. However soon after the man’s hands were reaching up to his own mask and hood, and with one swift tug his features were exposed. Hongjoong was stunned as he looked at the carved feature of Fire General Park Seonghwa, the man before him the human behind the legend, the leader who commanded respect from even his enemies with his fair practices and brilliant tactics, the man who held lightning in the palm of his hand. The first time he had seen his blue light crackle in the sky, he thought God himself must be truly against them. 

A calloused tan hand extended forward towards him, and Seonghwa spoke up in his low tone,

“It’s an honor to meet you Head Healer Kim Hongjoong, I’ve heard so much about you.”

  
  
  



	4. Dark and Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so the real adventure begins. I wrote this in pieces, so I hope it works all together as it should. To be honest, this chapter I've left a little hard to understand in some places, so forgive the poetic license I'm taking and forget about my poor grammar. Shout out to that Seongjoong gif that I keep replaying of them hugging and Seonghwa just engulfing Joong, you the real mvp of me finding the will to write this. Anyway hope you enjoy it and see y'all soon!

Hongjoong stared at Seonghwa’s outstretched hand for an uncomfortable amount of time, finally managing to weakly reach out and grip on, while pointedly ignoring the way his hand was engulfed by the others. “Large and intimidating” had never been his specialty, and he had long since moved on from the days where he would try and puff up to be something he’s not. He’s earned his respect in this world, and he did so through pure skill and gumption.

Still, there are moments when he would be looking up at someone who had the power  _ and  _ the mass, and he would kill for a few more inches to help him stand up tall. But those weren’t coming anytime soon if at all, so he swallowed the sudden wave of helplessness that was creeping up his throat, and lifted his chin to stare in Seonghwa’s eyes as best he could. When he spoke up his voice was strong and his eye’s scrutinizing, regarding Seonghwa like he was simply another man on the battlefield asking for his time.

Seonghwa, to his credit, didn't try to tower over Hongjoong despite his larger statue, his spine straight but his shoulders relaxed, body like a coiled snake that was simply watching for its opponent’s next move. Hongjoong figured it was his time to speak up, and he tried to keep any hostility clear of his tone.

“It is very interesting to see  _ you _ here General Park Seonghwa. I will admit I never thought it could be you on the other side of my letters. May I ask what has garnered a General’s interest in this subject matter?”

Seonghwa’s shoulders rose just a bit, and while his neutral face remained, Hongjoong was sure there was a twinge of impatience in his tone.

“Healer Kim I’m sure you understand my intentions here. As I’ve stated before, this is a lot to risk for anything else but something we both seem to seek so desperately. So why don’t you name it? Or do you dare not say it?”

Hongjoong’s eyes narrowed, he’s never been one to be called a coward when he risks more than most men do in a lifetime in a day. When his voice came out it was fierce, fire licking his words like the temperament he is so famous for. 

“For peace. I’d risk no less, and take nothing more.”

The smallest of smirks formed on Seonghwa’s lips, and his words came out just a little less clipped than before.

“I would risk it all as well, for the men who have followed me and for the ones who I buried with a promise of no more. And I suppose we have both figured out the best chance we have, as slim as it is, is this. Now shall we go back inside and talk about how we are going to get there?”

Seonghwa gestured with his head, and this time when he stepped forward he looked back at Hongjoong to make sure he was following along. Annoyed by Seonghwa’s confidence but a bit inspired by his determination, Hongjoong stepped out of the alley as well. 

Turning the corner they looked at where the bar stood in bright colors, lit up a neon shade against the dark sky from which the sun had just escaped. The air was still and chilled, not a single breeze stirred their hair. As they stepped inside once more and sat back on one of the benches, Hongjoong clenched his hand together, settling the lingering nerves jittering in his veins. Their eyes met and Hongjoong was glad for the peace he had a moment ago as it fled from him, Seonghwa’s features under the brighter light causing a hitch in his steady breath.

They both knew they couldn't stay here long, the danger of being recognized for one or both of their faces too high to be stalling, even in a town as far out as this one. The war had sucked in men from far and wide, and with the amount of people they both encountered, there's no doubt there were a few who could pick them out of a crowd lingering around. So they began to talk schematics about their next plan, laying out options and then striking them down. 

“Maybe we can go on a luxury boat straight there, you know something those people with too much to spend do. That would take only 5 days”

“Hmm... I think that would attract too much unwanted attention, Healer Kim. After all, only a couple of those go there a year and we would certainly be noted.”

“Ugh fine, what about going around to the northern coast, and then taking a short kayak out to the island?”

“That would take a month minimum, a timeline I’m not sure either of us can afford.”

Finally Hongjoong threw up his hands, a natural pout of exhaustion coming to his lips. 

“Well what do you want then? Should we just take that monthly ferry that leaves tomorrow? It would only take a little more than a week to get there I suppose.”

At this Seonghwa paused, seriously considering their possibilities here. 

“Well why not? It may seem too obvious but maybe that’s our best option, to blend in with the crowd. What are two more people on a popular trip to an island? If we keep as low a profile as possible, I think we could make it undiscovered.”

This time Hongjoong stalled his body to process this choice, his face scrunched as he thought hard about if they were taking the best path. In the end he realized that no matter what they did they would take some risks, but often the simple answer is the one that would make the most sense. 

“Alright I agree, let's go first thing in the morning then.“

They gathered themselves and stood up, moving out the door and back into the street. Not so coincidentally they found themselves walking back the same way to the only hotel in town, discovering that their rooms were only three doors apart. 

When they reached the upstairs hallway they split apart without a word, both men still unsure about their new partner. Back in his room Hongjoong ran through his bedtime ritual, rinsing his body and face before he climbed into bed and prepared to wake up with the morning sun. As his eyes drifted shut his heart still beat a fast tempo in his chest, the anticipation and wondering about what the next day would bring buzzing in his stomach.

When he made his way out the door the next morning with his bag slung over his shoulder, he wouldn’t be surprised to see nor did he expect Seonghwa to be out waiting for him, having made so many scenarios about what was coming next he didn’t have a clue which one to believe. But there he was, leaning casually against the wall by the window above the stairs, eyes already locked on Honjoong like a target. His face was half in the light and half in the shadows, making his sharp features even starker.

As he passed by, he felt Seonghwa join him down the stairs on his left side, walking slightly behind. Suddenly he heard a low voice from behind him, rougher than it had been yesterday, perhaps from the freshness of the morning. 

“Go to the boat and get two tickets and I’ll join you in a half an hour. I don’t want to let the people in town put together who we are when they see the two of us in daylight.”

Honjoong just nodded his head while facing forward, and walked straight out the door and to the harbor. When he arrived the sun was still painting the crest of each wave orange, the morning air crisper by the tumultuous sea. He bought two tickets for the next trip and set his belongings off to the side, preparing to wait another hour till take off. The world seemed clearer in that moment, the calm that comes from gravity of the ocean waves washing through him. It’s tides pushed and pulled, splashing the air with sprays of salt and water. 

He felt an affinity for the sea, water always attracting his attention and respect. Despite the jokes at his tempers expense, Hongjoong always knew he had the power of water inside him, the swell of energy that always flowed through his body and rested at his fingertips. He felt a little at home here, even in this strange town that has held many secrets for him. From the original letters to this dashed escape, all of that should have him jiggling his knee and glancing around, but he could never feel too anxious by such a large body of water.

He didn’t take a look up even as a presence stilled beside him, eyes focused on the horizon until the boat's horn blasted through the air and signaled the time to come aboard. This time Hongjoong and Seonghwa moved together, cutting across the plank and reaching the common area of the ship. Taking the key out of the first door they saw open, they walked into their small cabin with only a set bunk beds, a short dresser, and a chair filling the narrow room. This would be their resting place for the next 8 days, and neither Hongjoong nor Seonghwa were thrilled about having to be so close on their second day of meeting each other, but there were little other options.

Setting his stuff on the dresser, Seonghwa automatically began unpacking and sorting his clothing and possessions out, laying them down in a precise manner that let Hongjoong know he was the organized type even in daily life. Hongjoong didn’t feel any rush to put his stuff in the lower drawer, but knew he might get a bit of judgement from his new partner if he didn’t do so. After settling everything in the drawers they seemed to leave by mutual agreement, locking the door behind them and passing out the two keys between them. 

Walking up the hallway they climbed onto the deck where a few scattered people lingered, the boat probably carrying around 80 passengers to their destination. Already the bow was cutting through the water, sailing steadily into the open ocean. The wind was stronger out here, blowing through their clothes until they both stood huddled by the covered porch, purposely close so they could speak quietly among themselves. 

“I think we need to ask villagers about what they know first thing when they get there Kim, they are our best hope to find this compass quickly.”

“But asking a ton of people questions could be looking for trouble  _ Park _ , even on a small island like that, and especially when we go around together. I think we should explore the libraries and search for lore first, that will be our best bet to get there fast.”

“And how are we going to find lore without asking people  _ Kim _ ?”

Hongjoong let his eyes roll, not bothering to hide his irritation at the petty dispute they were already having. He and Seonghwa seemed like they hadn’t needed to compromise their opinions for a long time, and hadn't opened up to someone new in even longer. 

No doubt about it: they were in for a long trip.

…

Seonghwa and Hongjoong had lasted 6 days without actually throwing a fist at each other, and Seonghwa was honestly impressed. He had never tried to strategize a life risking mission while living in cramped quarters with nowhere to escape with any other practical stranger, but it seemed like a challenging task no matter the person. And while he and Hongjoong certainly had their tenuous moments, particularly when Hongjoong would go on his “you’re just a classic fire bender bullhead” rants (Seonghwa did  _ not  _ appreciate the stereotype, especially when Hongjoong hardly fit the ‘apathetic & cold’ water bender image), but overall they made it through with only constant bickering.

Seonghwa would pretend he’s above it, but Hongjoong’s height made a tease all too easy. And if he was being honest, the downright cute ‘put out’ pout Hongjoong would wear when he whined was a good incentive to keep poking at his weak spots. Neither were causing too much damage luckily, and when they did work together they excelled at making a solid plan. So far they had mapped out how they would approach a few villagers who seem willing to speak but not overly interested in strangers, and then find out where the local lore points to and piece together the compasses location. 

That night they sat out on deck until late, parrying ideas back and forth until they knew they had exhausted every relevant angle and still wound up in the same place. After that their conversation wandered, moving into territory they hadn’t touched on before.

“So you have your crew of healers with you huh? This Wooyoung sounds like a handful and Yunho barely any better, although I doubt they can compare to the sheer power of San and Mingi going off on a random tangent together.”

Hongjoong snickered a little but then straightened up, rising his nose in the air in faux offense of his friend’s honor.

“I’ll have you know Wooyoung is utter chaos enough to surpass any duo alone. One time he was so mad that some soldier insulted his riding skills that he kicked the man off his own horse and spent the next day healing his broken foot. Later he told us he had been practicing kicking while horse riding because he was thinking of making us compete in a local horse vaulting championship.”

Seonghwa let his lips curl a little on the left, squinting against the dying sun to see the fond look on Hongjoong’s face as he recalled stories of his past with his friends. While he wasn’t sure of his claim that Wooyoung could beat his boys in terms of chaos, especially when Mingi did, in fact, once force him to join an apron modeling competition in the town next to where they were fighting, which he embarrassingly won, but he was endeared enough by the clear love that painted Hongjoong’s face with such a soft pink, that he agreed. 

He wondered if his own face reflected that same light when he recalled the disaster that was trying to bake Jungho’s 22nd birthday cake, and how Jongho still teared up a little at the messy barely baked leaning tower that they served him. When his story was over, Hongjoong asked him something with a voice that was a little quieter, eyes focused on his own fidgeting hands. 

“Can I ask what pushed you over? What brought you out to this moment, living on a shard of hope when you could be experiencing life with your friends miles away from here?”

Seonghwa took his time with that one, running through the events that had led him here, and wondering how he was going to get it all out. In the end though, it was simple.

“For my friends, and those like them. The push was just looking at their scars, and the constant death of my men day after day, until I couldn’t close my eyes at night and convince myself it was all going to be okay. I had lost any hope for peace someday, and once the future of you standing still seems so hopeless there is nothing to do but move, even if you're sprinting towards your doom.”

Hongjoong looked like he was digesting that statement, eyes scanning back and forth like he was reading a book. After a long blink he looked up into Seonghwa’s eyes and told his own reasons with a passion.

“I understand, in fact my reason is practically the same. I know you have seen death, but I have seen pain. Whereas you have wandered the battlefield killing or picking up dead bodies, I have spent every moment trying to ward off death with a stick, only to send some men right back out there into his arms. I keep pushing and pushing, and I only grant them one more day, and can only give my friends one more moment of protection before we must risk it again. I really have nothing to lose, because living like that is just the ticking of a clock which you cannot rewind.”

They sat in silence after that, neither breaking their contemplation as the sun fully fell down. Once the black pitch of night set upon them Seonghwa stood, and Hongjoong followed soon after to go back to their room. Lying in his bed while Hongjoong slept in the bunk above him, Seonghwa couldn’t believe the partner he had found. Sure he may be messy, and frustrating to reason with, but never would he suspect that there was a man on the other side of this hopeless war ready to take the leap into the unknown with him.

Their task was dangerous, their mission was hazardous, and their goal was slim, but Seonghwa suspected that if anyone could get there, it might just be them. The infamous healer with a temper and a strong spine, and the stone faced general who fought with lightning and stood with his men through the fog of war, what a duo indeed. Comforted slightly by that thought, Seonghwa slipped into sleep with an ease unusual for a man with his kind of shadows.

That ease dissipated into thin air when he woke up to a mighty shake of the boat. This was no strong wave or gust of wind, no Seonghwa already knew that this was the gasp of a dying man. Leaping up he found Hongjoong’s eyes already wide open, staring down at him in rapidly growing anxiety that he released with a loud, “what the fuck”. Snapping into action, Seonghwa gathered as much of his own stuff into his bag as he could, and then shoved in what he could manage of Hongjoongs, prioritizing the underwear and soap and not paying attention to the rest. 

He heard Hongjoong climb down behind him and he grabbed his hand to run out of the room, accidentally slamming both of them against the opposite wall as the boat took a rocky swing to the right. While climbing through the hall as fast as they could to reach the top deck, Hongjoong was yelling at the top of his lungs for everyone to make their way out as fast as they could, going as far as to bash on any locked doors as they passed them. When they finally reached the top it was clear what was wrong: the whole sea had frozen into icebergs in front of them, and water bender bandits were raiding the storage for any goods.

Seonghwa wanted to be angry at the lives these men had just sacrificed to get what they wanted, but he knew the island close to this one has been thoroughly stripped of resources for the war, and criticizing a desperate man who was willing to kill seemed hypocritical at this point. Hongjoong cursed them out next to him but also pointed an emergency vessel off to the side, obviously indicating where they should head. 

Seonghwa fought to get there over the rolling deck, ankles straining as he twisted this way and that to get steady. One bandit approached but a quick burst of fire warded him off, the man obviously untrained in the art of fighting if he was still here and not in the battlefield. He looked young, face pale and arms skinny, and Seonghwa wondered if he’ll ever find justice in this world. 

When they both finally made it in the small boat, Hongjoong lifted his hand and pulled the sea up the sides, sweeping them off the wooden planks and into the chilled water. When he and Hongjoong looked back up to try and wave down any survivors, they were greeted with a horrible sight. The whole top of the boat was now aflame, the raging captain screaming about taking the bandits with him to the grave. Within a minute the hull was either sunk or in blackened chunks, and when the wind and tide began to swell while rippling out from the sinking boat, neither Seonghwa nor Hongjoong even bothered to try and fight it. 

The current was too strong, and what they left behind too grim to face. They sat in total stillness despite the strong waves, both of their bodies braced against the sides to keep them steady. No planning was happening, no response or explanations made, just two men wondering how they were going to feel in the daylight. The night was particularly dark, black smoke still blowing in from behind them and blocking the moon’s rays. 

So there they sat, two men adrift in the blackest of seas. 

  
  
  



	5. The Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back again! I took a little break but I'm glad to get back to this fic. A little bit of tension and a lot of philosophical rambling here in this chapter, so I hope you guys like it lol. As always please leave a comment so we can chat about the plot or Seongjoong! See you soon :).

The boat’s gentle rocking was driving Hongjoong to the brink of insanity. 

They had survived the burning ship mere hours ago, with the sun only now peaking above the sea line. Its orange glow surrounded them, reflecting into the depths, the image of fire once again haunting Hongjoong even while floating on water. The thought of him and an unfamiliar fire bender now completely trapped together on this boat crawled up his skin, the sudden paranoia that Seonghwa could set them both ablaze at any moment festering in his mind. 

He tried not to be obvious as he scooted away, but when he could feel a piercing gaze on his head he knew he hadn’t succeeded. Despite that he didn’t look up, simply curling up smaller on his short wooden seat. The silence was deafening now, the wall between them stronger than ever before. Even when he was worried in the beginning he didn’t feel the repulsion he did now, this urge to be free from the circumstantial shackles that now bound him and this dangerous man together. 

After another hour or two of just floating Seonghwa cleared his throat, trying to keep his voice from its usual menacing gravel that comes in the mornings after disuse. 

“Healer Hongjoong, I understand what we just experience was terrible, but we have to move on and think about how to go forward. We are stuck in the ocean with no real clue on where is the right direction, we need to start planning this out together.”

Hongjoong couldn’t deny the truth and he wouldn’t try to, but the patronizing flat tone he felt Seonghwa was taking with him struck a cord. He was a man who has seen horror damn it, but that didn’t mean he was weak to stop and pause after a dozen people just burned.

“Well I sure as hell know war and death  _ General  _ Seonghwa, so I am no stranger to horror, but that doesn’t mean I can’t take some time to mourn those who just burned to death on a ship they thought would be a fun trip! I’m not sure how the Fire nation treats those whom it burns, but we spend some time to grieve before making plans and shoving forward.”

Hongjoong hadn’t even realized that Seonghwa’s face was slightly open until it closed, a steel gate of neutrality swinging shut on his reaction to that not so subtle slight. Hongjoong would feel bad for his unnecessary comment if he had the capacity, but here trapped on this boat still shaking he felt nothing but a little joy that he could put even more space between them. He couldn’t deal with this “partner”, not when he was left with no options, no time, and no trust.

So they drifted longer, the calm sea floating them further into the unknown. When half the day had passed them by, Hongjoong knew he had to speak, the silence now too much when words had felt overwhelming before. Considering what would work, Hongjoong figured it was best to simply strive forward and take the moment as it may come. 

“I can extract the salt out of sea water and get us something to drink.”

Seonghwa just nodded, pushing his dark hair out of his face to stare into the wobbling water below them.

“I can strike fish, boiling them out of the sea. I can help heat water to cook and push the boat forward, once we have a direction to go of course.”

The tension remained but there was little to be done about it now, both men knowing this was a time for action if they were to make it out. Hongjoong was almost restless at this point, solidifying and pushing out the foreign particles in the sea water at a rapid rate. As he guided his hand and chi through the movements a bit of peace returned to him, the calm that came with his connection to the passage of water through him always calming. He swept his fingers with grace in the air, cool splashes lingering on his heated skin, every breeze highlighting the droplets on his clothes. As he felt his element around him, he let his stress sink into the ocean below. 

Then a flash of light snapped his eyes opened, his hands coming to cross his chest defensively before he could even think. As a huge puff of steam rose up he could only stare at the several dead fish floating in the bubbling water, body long conditioned to fear the presence of fire. As Seonghwa moved to collect the fish Hongjoong tried to steady himself once more, knowing that there was no helping the fact that they both had to get through this together, and using their elements would only be the intelligent thing to do.

Moving past that, he spent the rest of the day sorting and gathering all the water he could, collecting it in one of the emergency buckets in the kit on the boat. It was meant to be a bathroom tool, but Hongjoong didn’t even want to think about that situation right now. Filling it to the brim, he then extracted the map of the area held in the kit’s clutch, thankful that someone was more prepared for this emergency then them. 

Leaning over slightly, Seonghwa inspected the map beside him, and they both contemplated how they could locate their destination on the map. If they knew where they stood, then they could understand where they needed to go, but unfortunately they had only vast blue around them. Seonghwa spoke up, his voice a little too close to Hongjoong’s ear for his liking.

“I think we should wait for night then observe the stars. We know the north star will shine brightest, and our destination was mostly north from the past island. We’re lucky we made it most of the way, or this would be a much harder task.”

Hongjoong just muttered a little “doesn’t feel lucky” but nodded, and the oh so stoic General Seonghwa graced him with a half roll of his eyes. Hongjoong almost pressed it, a little excited to see some genuine emotion from the stone carving he had been dealing with since the sinking of the ship. But soon the mask was back on completely, and Hongjoong decided to stick with his task and pray to survive this trip until he could get back to real land and sanity.

…

Seonghwa wasn’t prepared for the blow up. It had been four days at sea, longer than either of them had hoped, and he could admit that their prospects were not looking very good. The constant element bending was tiring, and the sun beat down mercilessly each day. Fish was a food he would not eat for a while. But they had a system, a routine and a map that made enough sense to give them a sense of purpose and a goal that seemed attainable. It had all been going rather smoothly in comparison to their rocky first day.

But that evening as the sun went down, Hongjoong just sat there so still the rocking of the boat simply emphasized his immobile body. It had been an hour of this, Seonghwa watching a frozen man who was only looking at the planks at the bottom of their boat. At first Seonghwa simply allowed him his time alone, but they had food to eat now and all Hongjoong could do was stare at it.

“Healer Hongjoong, it's time to eat.”

Hongjoong scoffed, and Seonghwa immediately tensed as storm clouds seemed to brew above Hongjoong’s fiery head.

“There is no need to call me healer, its not like I ever helped you or your men.”

There was a aching bitterness to Hongjoong’s words, and an alienation Seonghwa could feel in his stomach. And while Seonghwa's face remained passive, a boil began in his chest.

“Well healer or not then Hongjoong, it’s time to  _ eat _ . And I somehow doubt you never saved a Fire soldier once or twice, a man like you doesn’t strike me as someone who would leave a wound gaping.”

Hongjoong’s face twisted, his temper displayed like the lashes of a fire on his face. The purpling sky was clear above them and the water was red around them, the boat cutting through the ocean of blood. 

“It isn’t your job to pet my head like a child, and remind me to eat. You do not understand my fear because you don’t take me seriously, as a threat or an ally. You think you know it all, or maybe just more than me, but you will be a stupid corpse on this boat just like me in the end.”

Perhaps it was the little sting of truth in the idea that he thought Hongjoong was just being dramatic, maybe it was the prick at his own fear filled thoughts he was trying to keep at bay, but Seonghwa wasn’t going to stay passive on this.

“So what? What have you given me to take seriously but anger and distance? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I cannot give you space and we both made our choices to be here, so don’t act like I deserve your fear fueled lashings.”

Now Hongjoong was standing, body rigged and eyes narrowed, the sea now jolting them up and down as the waves grew tumultuous around them. Seonghwa rose as well, the beat of his heart pounding out a rapid rate as he tried to keep his hands cool.

“And so what if I show you some emotion! I am not begging for your help, asking you to fix my problems, I’m just FEELING. And you can’t seem to handle that!”

Seonghwa clenched his fists in an effort to stay calm in this storm brewing between them, but he had never been as restrained as he pretended.

“Well one of has to be thinking as well as feeling, or we wouldn’t have gotten anywhere. What am I suppose to do if your just over there breaking down?”

His voice rose at the end, and he instantly regretted it as he saw something break in Hongjoong’s eyes. Suddenly the water was whipping out around him, streams of it rising out from underneath. He quickly burned anything that came near him, evaporating the out pour.

“FUCK YOU! Stop acting like you’re better than your own EMOTIONS. STOP pretending like I’m just a fucking child! I have fought in war, I have felt death’s door crack open, I know fear and hurt like the back of my hand, but I don’t want to die floating on some god damn ship with someone I don’t even really KNOW!”

At the end Hongjoong was panting, speech over and hands drooping, until he simply collapsed on the bench, hand covering his twisted face.

Seonghwa sat as well, knowing that his comfort would not be appreciated and would never be enough when he had no guarantees to offer. Watching Hongjoong’s body slightly shake, he allowed his loneliness to sink in for once, opening up the steel door to his aching heart for one moment in understanding of the desperate man before him. Perhaps he was the coward, never letting in or pushing out all that haunted him.

As the sun fully set Hongjoong silently sat up, then laid out on the tarp they had been sleeping on at night. Seonghwa looked up at the vast stars above him, clearer than he had ever seen, sizzling in the sky like droplets of fire on a vast ocean above. Their stunning light shone on him, his eyes reflecting their varied twinkle. Deciding he wanted more than just the cold beauty of the sky, he leaned down himself, and cleared his throat to ask.

“May I hold you?”

He wasn’t sure of Hongjoong’s expression with his back turned towards him, but he understood the tilting of his head. As he adjusted his body to fit with Hongjoong’s back, he slipped one arm around his middle. Hongjoong was unwashed, four long days in the sun taking a toll on both of their hygiene, but he still breathed him in, enjoying the simple scent of another person in a lonely night. Thinking about what they both said and what they went through, Seonghwa wondered if he should speak. In the end Hongjoong beat him to it, voice soft but also sore where it came out of his throat.

“What a fate. The great and mighty General Seonghwa and the infamous Head Healer Hongjoong curled up on a shitty little boat waiting to die. All that war, all that death we survived, and now we might end it all on the damn ocean.”

The laugh that came after was just this side of deranged, but Seonghwa liked the sound, and the feeling of Hongjoong bouncing as it came out of him. Smiling slightly, Seonghwa thought the image was indeed a hilarious twist of fate. He decided to keep the chat going with a tale of his own.

“I met the fire king a few times you know, each general has to come in for an annual meeting that is more a loyalty check than a strategy session.”

Hongjoong’s head turned more towards him, and his eyes shone with curiosity, the idea that he could hear a first hand account of a man who has controlled their lives so drastically obviously intriguing to him. Seonghwa let a sad smile linger on his lips, sure that that wonder will soon be replaced with frustration.

“The scariest part about the man was that he was a fool. Ten years older than both of us but only a child, always asking about what could be gained rather than what would be lost. He talked about war like a game, a match of exciting moments and new items to snatch, as he sat tucked away high above the uneven ground. What a pitiful life to live, full of the illusion that you are God when you are no more than an ambitious boy allowed too much sway, wrapped in delusion like a man who has lost all sensation of the world. I may have drunk from the bitter chalice of pain and had to put my life on the line, but I would choose it any day to the comfort of a man who knows no value in life at all.”

At that Hongjoong just gave another laugh, tired but genuine, at all the ways fate had fucked with them. Turning back around he just sighed, and spoke up in a voice even smaller than the last.

“Are we so different from him General, just for knowing the hard truth? Sometimes I wonder what I will answer when I am called before my sins. Whether I will ask for mercy, or crave the punishment of a cold blade. The Gods may hear me and laugh, when they see me cower for my crimes when thousands of killers in this war have come before them. I have killed two, and while you may scoff at that amount the I’d argue numbers only matters if it is zero or more. They were men who were trying to attack me and my healers, but if that was a plea that worked then forgiveness would be endless. I wonder if it will be given to me.”

Seonghwa tightened his grip, stroking the creases of fabric that lay twisted underneath Hongjoong’s middle. The material was soft and worn, and he wondered how long it had lay heated on Hongjoong’s body. When he spoke, his tone was close to a whisper, hidden even in the empty expanse of night.

“I have searched for forgiveness, I have fought for peace, and I have killed for the hope of another chance at life. What I have learned is that people will give clemency and damnation based on their own reflection, and the twist they see on their face. If others want to pretend that you could never be them but you look to much like them then they are harsh. If they want to act as if their sinless soul means something more than the just the privilege of those who have never had to reach real ground, then they will clamor for your downfall. If your resemblance is less striking however, than they will allow mercy on you, the chance to paint your picture in a better light. After all final moral judgement belongs only to the dead.”

Hongjoong’s breathing remind steady, but his fists curled up next to him tightly. His eyes squeezed shut, like even they couldn’t block out the spotlight.

“Is that it then? A message not to let others judge my soul and to wait and see what is the final call? Is all life made up of just waiting for death?”

Seonghwa breathed in the salty air, letting it sting his raw nose until it hurt just the right amount. The world seemed so still it was almost like they were already ghosts, whining and wondering about what they should have done while alive.

“I’m saying no one can grant you peace with your past or your future. Time is not linear, passing you by and then gone, it warps with your perception of its path. Sometimes you look back and every failure feels like a lesson that has lead you to the right road, other times it feels like all you’ve done is fall again and again. Your future is made up of your past and your own actions, and no one can force it to happen. The only thing you own is now, and the only person that can save it is you. So all I’m saying is, take an earnest breath.”

Hongjoong shivered, the damp air sinking into him even as the firm warmth continued to lay behind his back. After all the fuss he made about trust, he couldn’t help but feel grateful Seonghwa was here. To leave this world without a person beside him felt worse than any judgement the Gods could give him, and Seonghwa was not just anyone. Hongjoong felt raw, bleeding all over this boat with self pity at his helm, yet Seonghwa could understand more than most what it was like to know that you wouldn’t be saved. It was obvious in Seonghwa’s tone that he had formed these thoughts long ago on his own haunted nights, and the chill couldn’t take away the comfort of someone who understood. 

He didn’t say anything more, mind tired of its bouts of existential misery, and he desired nothing more than to face it just one day later. Curling tighter, he was glad to feel Seonghwa tuck in with him, smiling faintly and giving his hand a squeeze to signal the thanks he couldn’t say out loud. It felt intimate yet distant, more two animals seeking out a little bit of shelter on a rainy day than two men caring for one another, but sometimes it doesn’t take a history together to feel like a connection was meaningful. And perhaps a warm embrace was more comforting than what empty words could give. As he let sleep take him, Hongjoong was glad to escape the cycle of worse case scenarios in his head. 

When sleep left him the next day and the morning sun filled the sky, Hongjoong raised his head in turn, and he was greeted with the sight of land ahead. 

  
  
  



	6. Foolish Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woops. It has been a while. Sorry I've been feeling uninspired, hopefully y'all like this chapter and this story can keep moving. Anyway see you soon (I hope), and I'm excited for the ATEEZ comeback!

Hongjoong felt like it must be an illusion cast by an especially cruel god, snickering in delight behind the nearest cloud. He waited for the image to waver, to ripple like mist cast away in a strong breeze. Yet the island remained in front of him, emerald treetops shimmering in the distance like the whole sky was made of crystal, wrapped around by a golden coastline. Although he could feel the hard wood of the boat dig into his knees and the heat of the sun sink into his skin, he still couldn’t believe it was not a dream. He wasn’t sure how long he stared at it until he heard a gravelly voice from below mumble “Hongjoong?”.

Eyes out of focus and mind in a daze, Hongjoong gazed down at Seonghwa’s lined face, Seonghwa’s dark eyes squinted against the harsh light that crowned Hongjoong’s head as he observed the stunned man above him. Shock evaporating, Hongjoong dropped to his knees all at once, and flung his arms around Seonghwa’s neck. Hongjoong’s eyes squeezed shut as he clung to the only thing that made sense in the moemnt. He felt Seonghwa tense, and then begin to pat his back, perhaps trying to comfort the trembles in his body. In a whispered voice, Hongjoong finally spoke up. 

“Behind you- Seonghwa behind you. Its real, oh my god… its _ real _ .”

Hongjoong felt Seonghwa’s neck twist, and he could feel the moment he saw it too by the energy that rippled trough his body. Hongjoong felt a sort of whiplash as Seonghwa grabbed him tighter than ever, face burying into his hair and breath shallow where it barely pushed out of Seonghwa’s constricted chest. Hongjoong pulled back slowly, and they simply shared the moment of amazement together, reading the joy and relief as it twirled in each other’s eyes. 

Before he could even register it he was hysterically laughing, only noticing when Seonghwa immediately joined in, peals of cackling bursting from their lips until they both silently shook on the ground, one slowing down and then looking at the other and continuing right up again. Never had Hongjoong pictured Seonghwa’s face as he saw it now, eyebrows scrunched so hard it looked panful, mouth wide open and hands grasping hold to whatever they could find. More often then not that was him, as they held on to each other when everything else seemed tilted.

As their exuberance faded it left them exhausted, both men more tired then ever now that the finish line was in sight. Body creaking, Hongjoong gathered himself and stood, taking a step and offering a hand to his companion. Seonghwa looked up with a lidded gaze, head lazily tilted against the top of the boat and eyes pausing to make calculations about the gesture. After a moment he took the help, letting himself be pulled to his feet and then taking in a large breath.

They stood at opposite sides of the boat and began to bend, Hongjoong pulling the waves towards them and Seonghwa pushing heat into the ocean to propel them forward.

Perfectly synchronized they warped the sea by their will, Hongjoong steering them straight to the beach front and Seonghwa blasting them with speed, both giving the last dregs of strength they had left to achieve a sliver of safety. By the time their boat began to skid on the ocean bottom, Hongjoong could barely stand, his head spinning but his eyes refusing to shut despite the exhaustion closing in on his vision. They were dragging to a holt until a blast of fire came from his left, skidding them straight into the sandy bank and rattling the boat until it turned over. 

Both men flopped onto the sand, neither moving from where they lay face down in the gritty shores. Hongjoong felt like a washed up whale, sputtering out on this barren bank. He shifted his head to flip a new cheek on the hot surface and ended up staring at Seonghwa’s peaceful face, his eyes closed and his skin completely smoothed. Hongjoong felt something white hot tremble in the pit of his stomach, a feeling that ached to be acknowledged. 

It wasn’t anger, maybe it never really was. It wasn’t even envy like he once thought, nor fear which had blinded him a night ago. No, it was  _ desire.  _ Not the possessive kind he used to get when he saw the glittering gems at the Saturday market as a child, nor the protective kind he felt about Wooyoung and Yunho when he wanted to hide them away from the imploding world. Instead it was a desire to simply exist in this man’s world, to be seen and held as something precious, as someone who was irreplaceable because they were understood. 

As Seonghwa’s eyes creaked open, Hongjoong wondered if he could see the naked want in his eyes, or if it was buried under the loneliness that threatened to swallow his heart whole. There was different kinds of loneliness, shades of aches in his chest. And here devoid of friends and looking at a partner who had no reason to care, he was sinking through those layers fast. Suddenly he felt a hand close on his cheek, the palm rough with callouses and as damp as the rest of their bodies and so, so warm. Seonghwa said nothing, just rested his hand for a long moment, his eyes rounded and softer than Hongjoong imagined they could be. 

Seonghwa retracted his arm finally and then stood, sand spraying on Hongjoong which he spit out as fast as he could. Peering up through the sun’s harsh rays, Hongjoong saw a hand before him, and didn’t hesitate to grab on and let it pull him upward. Seonghwa gave a big sigh and shook out his curling dark hair, hands scrubbing his face as he seemed to collect himself. Looking back he spoke over his shoulder to Hongjoong.

“Come on lets head to the village. I don’t know about you, but I’d rather starve to death right here on this cursed sand than eat fish one more time.”

Hongjoong let out a loud snort, bending down to sling one pack over his shoulder and carry one on his arm to hand over, then toddled over to fling an arm around Seonghwa’s broad shoulders. 

“Lead the way good General, I say fuck the compass- let’s find a warm meal or die trying.”

Seonghwa chuckled and wrapped an arm around Hongjoong’s waist, a boxy grin set on his face. He took the other pack in hand, and off they set step in step towards the forest’s edge.

…

By the time they saw the beginnings of civilization, Seonghwa’s grin had long since slipped off his face. Replacing it was a grim set of his brow, determination the only expression he had energy to show. Hongjoong was keeping up as best he could, and together they were stumbling though while leaning on each other in an effort to keep standing. Soon the dirt path began to run into pavement, and Seonghwa felt a burst of energy at the knowledge that they were getting close.

Now practically dragging Hongjoong along, Seonghwa quickened his pace through the first couple of houses they passed, mostly ranches with large lines of crops and animals chewing lazily by the side of the road. Seonghwa never thought he’d envy a cow with a mouth full of grass, but here he was walking by with his eyes narrowed in spite. Finally he saw a tight line of buildings together, and a few people outside milling about from one place to another. The town looked colonial, houses built of creaky wood and faded white paint. They begin to attract stares from the people they passed, but Seonghwa couldn’t care less.

When he looks to his right he saw it, like a beacon calling his name in a stormy night. ‘Solon’, the crackling letters read, and as soon as he could Seonghwa pushed through the beaded curtains on the entry with a crash. The couple of men drinking in there immediately turned their head at the noise, but their faces were just a blur as Seonghwa slammed his way to the bar and collapsed on the chair, ignoring the way Hongjoong’s head thumped down on the counter. In a low and carefully even voice, Seonghwa spoke.

“How much for two waters and bowls of house stew?”

The man at the counter was older and it showed, his beard greying along his chin and eyebrows bushed where they toped his sharp eyes. Despite that his veiny arms showed the muscle of a man who still worked for his living, the type that was always just a bit stronger than one thought. He looked them up and down, and turned around to fetch a yellowed glass.

“If I was a mean man I’d say 100 pence for a person in your state of desperation, but luckily for you I’m a smart man, who knows what a starving boy will do for bread. I’ll tell you what- move those drink boxes down to the pier tomorrow morning and we’ll call it even huh?”

Seonghwa just nodded, knowing when to take a kind offer when he needed it. If there’s anything that war thought him, its that pride means nothing when one’s life is on the line.

When the steaming bowls and tall waters were set down on the dark wood slab in front of him, Seonghwa closed his eyes for a second, then picked up the glass and chugged. Before he was even half way through he wrenched the cup away from his mouth, knowing he would just puke if he didn’t slow down despite the ache in his stomach. Gaining enough energy from the liquid, Seonghwa picked up the glass and pulled Hongjoong’s head back and poured water into his open mouth. Within a second Hongjoong sputtered and he stopped, letting him cough it out. Hongjoong’s eyes burned holes into the side of Seonghwa’s passive face, before he turned to the stew on the table and seemed to figure out he had better things to do then be bitter about his wake up.

They both ate quickly, ceramic bowls scrapped clean in minutes. Immediate needs finally taken care of, Seonghwa sat up straight on his stool and waved to get the older bartender’s attention. 

“Where is the closest inn to here?”

The man gestured his chin to the side towards the door, eyes on the glass he was whipping down.

“Two blocks down and three blocks to your right, should be clearly labeled as Addy’s Inn. You boys tourists or something?”

Seonghwa just nodded his head absently and stood, bowing slightly in gratitude. 

“Or something. Thanks for the meal, I’ll be back tomorrow at sunrise.”

He pulled Hongjoong’s arm, still steadying the fiery headed man. Hongjoong was smaller and skinnier than Seonghwa was from the start, and it was no surprise that the exertion and starvation was taking a bigger toll on his body. They made their way back onto the streets, stepping off the porch and onto the cobbled path once more. 

As they marched through town, Seonghwa followed the instructions as he was given, and sure enough they wandered into Abby’s Inn in no time. The entry room was bigger than Seonghwa expected, the red wallpaper with silver flowers around the corners both charming and corny at the same time. The young woman who greeted them was cheery enough, and she informed him that they could exchange his imperial coins for the local pence right there at the corner. The rate of trade was rather absurd, but Seonghwa had no real attachment to the money he carried and was simply happy that it would be more than enough to cover a weeks stay. 

Gathering their things and the man beside him, Seonghwa dodged around velvet white furniture and made his way to the stairs at the end of the hall. Practically lugging two packs and a full grown man up 3 flights of stairs wasn’t his idea of a good time, but he sure as hell had had worse. Once they reached the room Seonghwa jammed in the key and shoved the door open, letting their stuff fall as he hoisted Hongjoong onto the bed and sat down to catch his heaving breath. 

The sweat and salt crust on his body began to feel unbearable now that he knew a shower was six feet away, and soon enough he stood once more. He collected his last pair of unworn clothes and a bar of soap he bought at a market right before he left that smelled of jasmine and mint from his pack, then put the rest of the clothes in the wash bin. Wandering into the tiny white bathroom, Seonghwa immediately turned on the water to let it heat up, and cracked a window to let out the steam. 

Stepping out of his well worn clothing and under the hot spray felt like a slice of heaven on earth, a mercy granted on him after a long trial was over. Never had slathering on soap felt so holy, the pungent scent of the bar filling the air with a sweet and cooling spray. He must have stayed there for 15 minutes, and when one had been trained for years in the military to be out in 3 or less, that was saying something. 

After drying off and dressing he came back into the main bedroom, now having the time and mental energy to look around. Hongjoong was still sprawled out on the end of the mattress, red hair looking magenta with all the oil and grime in it. Seonghwa was just glad the man was not under the covers, especially considering there was just one king sized bed. The bed in question was red, a seemingly common theme in this inn, and it had a lace lining that Seonghwa hoped wasn’t as scratchy as it looked. There was one large black lamp in the corner and a short desk with 4 drawers and a stool in its middle, each of them on either end of a small wood burning stove.

The sun was already low in the sky and there was nothing better Seonghwa could think of than sleeping, so he opened up the sheets and slid inside. As he got settled he looked below him at Hongjoong’s tamed features, calm like the ocean when the waves totally stilled and the whole thing shimmered in the light. It wasn’t so long ago that Hongjoong had been a figure out of a story to him, a whisper of a healer who blazed like fire and never let the Gods steal a life without a fight.

And he was that and more, a man with a spirit alight, who felt for, and fought with, each person he met, a man who has toed the line between dark and white and has lived more from it. Perhaps Seonghwa was simply projecting, but when he looked into Hongjoong’s eyes he felt a connection between two people who carried the same weight, who share the same desperate mortal desire to protect any life they could. Often that aspiration felt hollow, like he was a foolish child whose pail had developed a hole and yet he couldn’t stop trying to fill it with water.

But when he looked at Hongjoong he felt a sense of hope, one he hadn’t allowed himself in a long time. Hongjoong saw him, not simply his role or legacy, and that allowed the kind of venerability and understanding that he hadn’t felt for years. Was it too much to wonder if they could be real friends, ones who held onto each other for more than just support to stand? Seonghwa wasn’t sure if that was too wishful, but maybe he could allow himself to be foolish a little longer with someone by his side. 

…

He was nervous to bring this news to his King, especially considering his lord’s notorious temperament of a stubborn kid who still thinks reality bends towards his will. But this information was too important to simply sit on, the rumors spreading like wild fire from a source who remains mysterious. He walked down the grand hall of the palace, the mahogany wood walls shining in the morning sun like the coals of a fire stoked to life by the sun’s breath. His black laced boots made steady thumps against the bamboo floor, contrasting to the stuttered pulses of his heart.

When he finally reached the towering door dripping with gold accents he nodded to the guard next to it, and the palace study opened with a great gust. Sitting on his favorite sapphire encrusted pillow was the Fire Lord himself, his eyes digging into the man’s skin who dared to interrupt him. Slowly he tilted his head but a few degrees, an indication to speak now or forever hold your tongue. Bowing extra low, the nobleman at the door cleared his throat, and prepared the speech he had rehearsed a hundred times. 

“My lord I am here to inform you of a troubling piece of news that is circulating in my region in the north. While the source is unknown, there is much buzz about the potential of a traitor in our army who is going looking for-... for the man of four elements my lord.”

He couldn’t say the name, not when its very utterance could cost him a limb, but he knew that the fire lord knew exactly what he meant by the widening of his eyes and the heat that rolled through the room. 

“One of ours is going after the AVATAR.”

The last word boomed out of his mouth, precious heirloom vases shaking in their cases and papers blowing off the large desk and onto the ground. The Lord’s long mustache hairs were even singed, the fire in his eyes unlike anything the noble had ever seen before. When the man at the door spoke it was in a voice as low as possible, forced calm creaking at the vowels.

“Yes, my lord, so the rumors say.”

The fire King stood up quickly, walking to his desk while his red and gold robes swung behind his lean body with a twirl. Finally reaching the rich wooden slab he grabbed on to its edge and peered at the nobleman once more, lips pressed together and feet ticking a sporadic rhythm on the floor. 

“So find him, and destroy him. We will make an example of this crazed idiot, we will burn him and whats his to the ground. Let Rehun know we will be needing his services.”

The noble couldn’t hide the pale complexion of his face, nor his whispered tone.

“Rehun sir?”

Now the Lord straightened up fully, staring down his nose at the cowering buffoon standing in his gold trimmed door, and spoke with slow precision.    
“I won’t ask again. Find this  _ fool _ .”


	7. In a Way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... it's been a while. I am back though, after stuff was just, too much for a long time. Anyway Seongjoong has just grown stronger in my absence and I'm excited to write more fics for them because tbh they are my comfort boys!!. Also! Please leave a comment if you have time, I'd love to hear something back even if its just a "nice" LMAO. See y'all later hope you enjoy this update!

The next morning was like a rush of sand through an hourglass, the early daylight quickly forming into stronger, harsher rays. Seonghwa had disappeared before the sun had even peaked, and had come back a bit sweater than before. In the meantime Hongjoong had showered and changed into what Seonghwa hoped was clean clothing, and soon enough they were bustling out of the hotel’s white painted doors and into town. It was still early enough that there were only a few people scattered around, mainly school children trudging to class with reluctant steps and heavy bags passing by fishermen with hands of leather out for the morning catch. 

The whole town felt surreal in its normalcy, especially when considering what its depths might hold. Quickly Seonghwa took Hongjoong’s hand and moved back towards the tree line, cautious eyes thrown over his shoulder as they walked. The gravel crunched under their thick boot, sounds fading slowly away as they moved out of the main street and near the quiet forest. Once they reached their apparent destination, Hongjoong looked up at Seonghwa expectantly, the bags under his eyes a little less harsh but his narrowed eyes no less piercing than yesterday. 

Seonghwa hummed and ran his tongue along the inside of his mouth, the invisible motion soothing his thumping heart. His black strands were still slick with perspiration from a hard morning’s work moving boxes at the pier, the cold air emphasizing each drop as it ran down his back. Hongjoong peered up at him like a grumpy cat, whiskers ruffled and head clearly not recovered from their rough journey here. Overall they both were in less than perfect condition, but Seonghwa hoped that wouldn’t hold them back when they needed it most. 

“So, I’m not exactly sure what our next step is here, but I’m open to suggestions. I know we talked about trying to get some of the lore around here without raising suspicion, but that’s not exactly a firm plan.”

Hongjoong shifted his jaw considering their options here, his tight chain necklace gleaming as he took a deep breath in. 

“Maybe we should just start with the library? I know that one woman we met on the ship- may the Gods take care of her soul- talked about a small one located on the island.”

They both took a pause, the mention of the disaster they had narrowly escaped stealing a bit of light from the day around them. Quickly as always though, Seonghwa moved on from the heaviness in his stomach. 

“That sounds good. I’ve got a decent idea on what direction it might lie in, this town isn’t exactly endless and on my walk this morning I saw a few government looking buildings headed south.”

Hongjoong just gave a tight nod and headed in that direction, long blue jacket huddled to his small torso. Seonghwa waited a moment just looking at his back, a weird pause holding him back. He wondered if this man before him was really just all fire and flashing emotions, or if there was something lingering under the choppy waters. A good leader is only good as his persona- Seonghwa would know. An inspiration, a steady helm in a storm, a last hope, those are all things a leader had to be. A role too big for a man, so he must become something larger. 

After a few steps Hongjoong looked back at him with a furrowed brow and expecting eyes, and Seonghwa wasn’t sure what the man saw but it made him pause as well. 

There was something unspoken in the air, a sizing up of each other. Seonghwa noted how long Hongjoong’s eyelashes were as they framed his narrowed eyes, how his slim fingers still held tiny chips of dye, an odd luxury from a man with such a practical outlook. Seonghwa wondered what compelled him to still bother with any attempt at beauty in this rotten world. Finally a loud yell sounded out, and they both broke eye contact to observe a man fumble for his dropped groceries, an older woman patting him on the head and helping him gather a bundle of spilled radishes. 

Spell now broken, they moved side by side again silently, their plain clothes blending into the huddle of people gathering for the morning market. The dust was high in the air, each breath dragging in a bit of grit. The temperature was more humid than Seonghwa was used to, perhaps due to the fact that they were now both closer to the sea and the equator than where he grew up. He didn’t mind the moisture where it passed by his skin, in fact he rather liked the feeling of being gently swallowed by the sky. He figured Hongjoong must also appreciate the water’s presence, just like the fire of a lantern or a stove was soothing to his own fire bending body just to be around. 

As they walked through the town Seonghwa was glad for the increasing heat in the air. So were the people of the town evidently, as they began to come pouring out from their houses to greet the day. Mothers hustled out the last of the children with a chide and a pat on the shoulder, and men walked out to work with whatever uniform their profession required, skin a darker color than Seonghwa was used to. They were well adapted to this southern climate, the sun clearer and longer lingering than his own colder hometown. As they finally rounded the corner towards their quest, Seonghwa wondered if these people even knew what hope this town could hold. No matter if they did or not, he figured he would find it regardless, for everyone he owed.

...

After a thorough investigation of the library and the older man who kept it, it was clear that if this town held secrets they didn’t bother to write them down. Hongjoong pinched his small nose bridge, a headache incoming from either the influx of words he had just tried to take in or the damn dust on this book. His nose itched and he let out his third sneeze of the hour, head feeling like it would split. After the stars faded from his eyes he slammed his hand on the stained page he was trying to make out, and looked straight into Seonghwa’s startled face. 

“ _ Enough.  _ We’ve been at this for 8 hours and look what it’s gotten us? A vague inscription and a few page long passage that may be talking about you-know-who, or maybe just a real friend that died wandering this cursed place! Let's just admit it: this isn’t a town that puts anything interesting in an old leather bound book. They aren’t like our empires and their obsession with permanence, knowledge isn’t some currency to be sold here, it's entrusted and given at goodwill.”

Seonghwa rested his head against the back of the bench they were sitting on with a thunk, an air of exasperation followed him like a little storm cloud with lightning above his head. Hongjoong held in a deep sigh, he knew it wasn’t the other man’s fault but the sun was sinking slowly but surely, and they had less than anything useful. Worse than that, they didn’t even have much of a direction to find anything. The few books that the librarian was able to give them with their purposely obtuse request were not helpful in the slightest. Hongjoong had long since taken off his jacket as the heat of midday had sunk in, but now he slipped it back over his vest with an effort to be a little more comfortable and maybe, just maybe, a little less irritable. 

Thinking over their options again, there was one thing that kept recurring to him. He was reluctant to mention such a thing, much less explain himself for being willing to suggest it, but this was not the time to hold back any option no matter his reasonable reluctance at it. Even dehydrated and a little loopy yesterday at the bar, Hongjoong had clearly remembered a gaze or two burning into his back, and he’d be damned if he didn’t know what to do with that. He looked up at Seonghwa, his steely determinations back.

“Listen, I know this will sound unusual for you, but I think we should try some light seduction. Nothing gives information like a man trying to impress. We are both attractive enough men, and I know how to play my cards right. If you’re uncomfortable then I’m not asking anything from you other than support if things don’t go over well.”

Now Hongjoong had prepared for some reluctance, maybe even a bit of light disgust, but he hadn’t prepared for the horror now twisting Seonghwa’s face. The man before him had a grand looking nose, one that held a prominence on his handsome face, and he could swear it turned a little upright. 

“Head Healer Hongjoong how could you suggest such a thing! I thought you were a man of honor, one who had dignity to uphold! Seductions just for information? Why not just go straight to  _ prostitution?” _

It was the tone, the scorn, the not so hidden ego that made Hongjoong feel so small and like he had boiled over. What respect and feelings of kinship he held for Seonghwa were small barriers to topple over as white hot rage filled him, an age old wound of being pushed below just for another person to feel tall being dug deep into once more. He leaned in just to make sure every gritted word would be heard, the breeze not enough to cool the angry flush on his face. Seonghwa took a small tilt backwards at the approach, eyes a little wide, but it wasn’t enough distance at all.

“ _ Well, _ someone’s a little smug! I guess all that humble attitude was little more than a facade then, something to put on a good face. Figures a fire bender would think of ‘dignity’ first rather than a desire for an important and selfless end. I should have never trusted you to understand anything when you clearly haven’t had a moment of empathy in your cold life.”

He took one more gulp of air and started right back up again, this time voice a little more hoarse and tone a little more scathing. 

“Why not go straight to prostitution you ask? Oh I’ll  _ tell you why- _ because there is no joy in putting yourself on display like meat in a butcher shop all dressed up for another’s consumption, because there is no sanctity in being spit at like  _ you _ are the problem while the men who pay you get to walk away with pride, because at least then I get to keep my body for my own desires and decisions. You may not know what it feels like to be desperate enough that dignity is a luxury you can’t afford, but at 16 with both my parents dead and gone barely leaving me with more than a month's rent I sure as hell did, so take your judgement and shove it up your superiority complex having ass.”

Hongjoong wasn’t sure what he expected Seonghwa’s response to be, in fact he might even have to admit he wasn’t thinking much about Seonghwa at all while he aired out his anger. But whatever he could have imagined, it wasn’t the quiet pause he got, or the thoughtful eyes which turned to stare at the flowering tree in front of them. Perhaps a week ago Hongjoong would have called Seonghwa’s expression stony, but now that he knew what truly closed down looked like, he could tell this wasn’t that. It was something calculating, something a bit mournful. Hongjoong just waited, a little entrapped by the sight, a little lost now that his molotov was met with calm water. 

When Seonghwa did look back over the storm of thoughts had passed, and all that was left was an honest plea in dark wide eyes. 

“I’m sorry for my rapid judgement and lack of understanding Hongjoong, I hope you can forgive my regression to a man I have long moved on from. I was my father right there, condemning what I couldn’t fathom, and that’s something I never try to be. You don’t deserve that from me, certainly not for this.”

Hongjoong heard more than felt the breeze that blew around them as the day broke into deep orange rays, the sun inching slowly closer to the horizon. There was something hollow growing inside him, an ache long smothered by the fire that usually held strong. It was all those slitted eyes that stared him down back then, as he shivered in too little clothes with lips a stained red; it was all those voices that hushed around him as mothers turned away, like he was no longer someone else's child. He had never gotten an apology, never bothered to ask for one. And even though Seonghwa wasn’t the same as all of them, he knew he had just let out anger far greater than this one man was owed. And in return Hongjoong had gotten a statement of true atonement, and a pardon for his own unfairly marked sins.

He blinked his stinging eyes, and looked up at a cloud blowing past above them. This time his own voice grew quiet, his words coming out with a dull lisp rather than rapid-fire. 

“I am sorry as well, Seonghwa. You have been dealing with more anger of mine recently than is fair, and while I still disagree with your earlier words, I’ve just said plenty of my own stupid assumptions in my fit of rage haven’t I.”

Hongjoong then scoffed, wiping up and down his tired face, trying to bring himself a little more focus in a sensitive time.

“I don’t know you or your life Seonghwa, and I guess to that end you don’t know mine. The short story is a sad one but the long one is more complicated than that, if you care to hear how l came to be.”

Seonghwa hummed, his baritone voice letting out a pleasant resonance in the air. His large hands were stuffed into his dark gray peacoat pockets. Everything about him looked like it was in black and white, only his tanned skin giving his image any color.

“Don’t feel like you owe me an explanation Hongjoong, I hope you know I’m not seeking some kind of justification from you. But if you have a story to tell, then I’m more than willing to listen.”

And something about that felt right, like a cracked door that you’ve been welcomed into but not shoved, and Hongjoong let a little part of himself open up. 

“I had a happy enough childhood, as much as one could while being a poor brat running around on the city streets. My parents were loving, enough for me to remember their image fondly. But my mother was always sick each winter and the war had already long begun, and before I knew it my father was gone to fight and she was working more hours than ever. So most of what I remember her by is the scent of a stew boiling late when she came home, and a few lullabies I’ll probably recall until I die. Within three year of my father leaving he was gone, and then two years from then a bad winter took her too.”

Hongjoong let out a long breath, not quite a sigh. It was an old ache but one that doesn’t fade, its pain buried but never less sharp at the tip.

“Once she was gone I realized how little the world really cared, too many new orphans from the war for the government to bother with the old ones like me, but too little work around for me to have a steady income on my own. So I turned to what I could find. I only properly worked the streets for a few months actually, although the mark of it followed me much longer. I got arrested for it 6 months in, and got a proposal: serve a year in jail or go straight to the army. I had planned to sign up at 18 anyway, so it sounded like a good offer. I’m sure the officers didn’t care much, they had been assigned to bring any sucker to die in the war they could. I showed a knack for the healing arts in training and had a chip on my shoulder to prove myself, and it took me a lot farther than anyone would have expected.”

Seonghwa’s head slowly nodded, his eyes never straying away from a growing bud on the tree, pink petals barely peeking out from its crown.

“I’m not sure what to say for you Hongjoong, so perhaps I will just give you a story in return.”

Hongjoong let his eyes rest on the pink splattered ground, and gave an affirmative hum of his own.

“There is an age old saying, I’m sure you know it, ‘Is it better to have loved and lost or to never have loved at all’. I wondered about that while hearing your tale, about your parents who you held dear but only could keep for a short while. My story is the other side, both parents of mine linger on this earth but I have no desire to see them once more. My childhood was cold, in the sense that I never knew family exactly at all. They were elites in the fire kingdom, and like most they got that way through greed for what they didn’t earn. We didn’t eat meals together nor share interests. They went to parties to talk to strangers in ball gowns, while loneliness drove me into the servants quarters to simply be next to another person. If there is a part of me that is loving I blame it on my dear butler, a title too small for a man who taught me all.”

At this moment Seonghwa closed his eyes, the memory or maybe just the light too much to bear calmly.

“When it was discovered my father had been stealing from his ‘charity’ which donated only to his own businesses, we fell from grace hard. ‘Friends’ sure do fade quickly once they gain nothing from your name. I was only 12 but everything I knew was gone then, even the butler for whom I begged. We lived in a smaller village where no one knew much of us at all, and I began to run in any direction I could get away. Now a ‘troubled’ child who drunk and messed around, I was beginning to taint my parent’s image even more. They demanded I signed up for the army once I reached 18 to help make their name proud once more, and claimed it was the only thing I could do to make up for my mistakes. And no matter your age there is a piece of you that wants to prove something to your parents, so I promised I would. I practiced hard for two years until entering the army as one of the best benders in my squadron. But the minute I saw a real man die, a true brother bleed in my arms, I knew there were much more important things to work for then pride.”

Hongjoong just closed his eyes as well, reflecting on how wrong he had been. He had accused this man of being cold, when his compassion was leaking out at every word. He had blamed him for having ego when that was clearly something he had already worked to overcome. In a way it was incredible that they had both ended up here, two powerful men who should have never become what they had. And in other ways that’s probably why they were sitting here, since they were both men who never fit right in this current system. Thus they came together to fix it, even if that meant breaking it entirely.

He saw a hand held out just below him, and he didn’t even have to think before he took it. This time their hands held tight, and Hongjoong was able to feel each callus on the fingers underneath his. The fact that Seonghwa’s hand engulfed his own felt comforting rather than entrapping, and he let himself dwell in the small sense of steadiness it brought. They just stayed like that, petals gathering on their feet as the rays grew red hot and then died, like the last embers in smoke. Eventually Seonghwa’s roughened voice spoke up from Hongjoong’s side, his body now facing towards him.

“Well I may not know a lot, but let me know however I can help you at the bar tonight. At least let's make a symbol in case you need help.”

Hongjoong cracked a small smile and tilted his head to rest a cheek on the back of the bench.

“The best thing you can do is to not look too attentive, if you look like you're challenging anyone you might divert a lot of attention. Just glance over as sneakily as possible, and if I’m in distress, I’ll hold up two fingers to my face as subtly as I can.”

Seonghwa’s fringe fell on his nose as he assented to the plan, and Hongjoong stood up firmly with Seonghwa doing the same beside him.

“Alright let's get back to the hotel then, I’ve got to get dressed for the occasion.”


	8. The Cold, The Wet, and the Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Just right 2000 words and that'll be fine thats all" is what I told myself and yet... 4000 words later here we are. I really don't know what it is about this fic and long chapters for me, but I guess its a blessing. I was in a bit of a slump on this chapter, but I like what I made and I'm excited for the next. Anyway enjoy!  
> Ps I have written "Seonghwa" so many times and yet I get it wrong a lot, so if you see anything... Don't <3.

If it was enough to make Mr. Poker face Park Seonghwa pause, than Hongjoong figured he must be doing something right. His top was mostly red lace and silk, thick enough to cover only what was essential. His bottoms were a nice pair of black slacks that cut just like he wanted. It probably wasn’t casual in a small town like this one, but at one of the bustling bars in the center of the Water tribe this wouldn’t even raise a brow. 

If he was being a bit boastful, he did wear it well. Seonghwa himself didn’t look half bad, his usual oversized coat gone for a more form fitting wool jacket that gave some actual shape to his body. However it was still obvious which one of them would be attracting the most attention. Part of Hongjoong felt a little queasy about that, after all it would be a lot of stares on him, but it was a necessary burden to bear. And for now… he didn’t quite mind the lingering eyes.

They set off for the bar long after sunset, the main town street open to only a few drinking places and some street vendors selling steaming morsels. Before they could walk into the big doors of the solon Seonghwa pulled Hongjoong aside, snagging some chicken skewers and tossing a few coins at the man behind the counter. He sat forcefully on the bench to the side of the stall, and gestured Hongjoong over to join him.

There were two sticks of mouth watering food and Hongjoong picked one up quickly to munch on, hand coming up to cover his mouth as he spoke. 

“Chicken before finding out important information huh? Why am I not surprised.”

His tone had no edge and Seonghwa took it with a good humored hum, his eyes and lips curled up. Here under the lantern’s light Seonghwa looked young, still a man firmly in his 20’s. Hongjoong wanted to know the cause of every little wrinkle around his face, to learn the thoughts in his present mind. 

He held his tongue, unsure of his place in this unfamiliar setting. Was it the adrenaline? Or the conversation where he shared more of his story than he thought possible? Maybe it was the feeling of displacement itself that was leaving him so flayed open, so quietly aching. In the end this man he had only known a few weeks was still the closest piece of home he had to cling on to in this foreign place. 

Seonghwa stood and took their platter with him, and Hongjoong crept up to stand himself, stretching his arms high above his head and releasing a tired groan. It was time to move on, and get this operation underway. As per their agreement Hongjoong entered first and sat right at the bar, ignoring the raised eyebrow of the barkeep and ordering a mix of mead and apple cider. Seonghwa was a minute behind, not even glancing his way as he headed straight towards a back table. 

It started out slow, a few men barking to him about this or that, eyes lingering on the shine of his reddened lips and arms moving closer to his delicate hands on the counter. He told stories, old ones of kids running around a market with store owners chasing after them and late nights with friends. Enough to make everyone feel like they got a read on him, but never enough to really know anything about him. It felt natural really, this performance of shallow depth. 

One man in particular caught his eye. A rough looking fellow with a short beard and chapped hands, and a gleam in his eye that was looking for trouble. Normally he’d stay away from that type, but right now he needed a risk taker. Someone who wouldn’t hesitate to give sensitive information to a stranger if it meant getting what he wanted tonight. Hongjoong observed him from his peripheral, enough that they both knew what he was really looking at, and waited.

Tonight he couldn’t chase, not with a man with possessive eyes and a foot that never stopped its incessant tapping. A smell of musk and whiskey bloomed in the air as a presence slid next to him, and suddenly the other men around seemed to have business somewhere else. Hongjoong didn’t let his gaze leave his glass as he stirred the ice around, waiting until the man demanded his attention. Sure enough a clack came in front of him, another glass full of auburn cider clunked on to the table between his arms. 

He made sure to keep his lips just curled at the edges, dark lashes shading his lying eyes. Nothing was said for a minute, the two men taking a moment to judge each other. For a second Hongjoong squirmed, wondering if his face was a see through as Wooyoung always said. But the truth was Wooyoung just knew him for far too long, and the smirk lingering on this stranger's face guaranteed that there was no problem in sight. 

“Now I haven’t seen someone quite like you around before, I dare say this place isn’t usually graced with such beauty.” 

Hongjoong let out an honest snort but kept his coy smile. It was always a bit of a rush when someone sunk into his allure.

“Well I’m not here for too long, I’m only around for a bit of work and then I’ll be on my way. Little did I know what an  _ interesting  _ town this turns out to be.”

The stranger had half an ear on his words and half right up his own ass, no doubt thinking more about what he could get out of this situation than what Hongjoong was interested in. Truly he couldn’t have picked better.

“Is that right? Hard to imagine what could be intriguing you out in the middle of this god forsaken sea.” 

“Hm I’ve always held a love for the ocean, although we’ve had a recent hardship in our relationship. And there's really nothing you can think of worth noting about this place? I’ve been hearing weird rumors since I got here.” 

A flash of edge returned to the man’s eyes, a sliver of distrust creaking his gravelly voice.

“Oh yeah? And what exactly have you been asking?”

It was a little troublesome that he seemed to have at least two brain cells to rub together, but Hongjoong was sure he could get his mind off things. He leaned in like he wanted to share a secret, voice curling at the end of each word. 

“Oh you know, old legends is all. Why I couldn’t believe how many exist in such a small place. The most I learned growing up was about Santa Claus!”

Hongjoong’s high pitched giggle sounded a bit off, like he couldn’t quite remember to control his volume. The man’s hand rested on his thigh and  _ gripped,  _ hard enough that he felt a cramp already starting. 

“Ah yeah all that ancient crap. Something about a man who died long ago on some god fearing mission, you know nothing that matters to anyone in the modern age.”

“Is that right? I wish I was born long ago, don’t all the stories make it sound fun?”

The man snorted and flashed Hongjoong a smile full of teeth a little off their mark, his eyelids hanging low. 

“What is there to envy about climbing into some stupid valley and dying for a cause that doesn’t even matter. I’ve seen men give themselves up for nothing but a pat on the back, and I decided to live for simpler things than that.”

“So you’ve watched men die pointlessly and your solution is to find your own pleasure and never look back?” 

Maybe Hongjoong shouldn’t have critiqued a man when he was trying to make him lower his guard, but the attitude annoyed him. Sure he understood the helplessness of it all, but if they were right this man was closer than anyone to something that could change things, and yet he clearly had just given up. 

“What the hell would you know! Nothing matters in this world when you're at the bottom of it, I don’t want to end up like the men of old or today.”

Hongjoong pressed in, breath hot on the stranger’s face and eyes demanding, throwing out a challenge for this bull to face. 

“Was what happened back then really so bad? Was one person’s sacrifice not noble?”

Now the man was a little red in the face, and didn’t even pause before he responded.

“Oh sure he had his mission that was given to him, but he didn’t even complete it! Supposedly he got the old caves on the bottom of the valley and then perished, just another mortal man who thought he could play god.” 

There it was- a hint, a glimmer of hope given by someone who didn’t even believe in such a thing. Hongjoong knew he couldn’t press it too hard now, he had too much to lose and too little believable reason to be curious. 

“Was that really it? He just got all that way and died huh?” 

Now the man’s eyebrow twitched in irritation, and he could tell if he stayed too long they might attract a lot of attention. It was time for a strategic retreat.

“Yes really. Now who are you again little boy?”

Hongjoong waved his hand and lowered his head slightly, hoping to pass as someone who wanted no problems and was scared by the turn this was taking. Honestly it wasn’t  _ that _ much of an act.

“No one really, apparently just a person that can’t read a room. Maybe it's best if I just go.”

The grip on his thigh had never loosened but when Hongjoong got up it naturally fell off, the man’s hand just hanging loose by his side for a second. The stranger didn’t say another word as Hongjoong turned, but he could feel eyes pierce his back the whole way out. As he passed through the exit he heard the scrap of a barstool and he quickly turned toward the alley. Might as well try and make this private.

Sure enough the second he was away from the streetlight he saw a shadow reach toward him, a long arm almost touching the fabric of his shirt. The man was on the ground before he even knew what was coming, Hongjoong’s fingers digging into the side of his neck. He squirmed for a minute trying to gasp, and then stilled, body limp on the stone pavement.

When Hongjoong looked up Seonghwa was staring at him, expression covered by the darkness around him. Despite his better logic Hongjoong felt like he was caught doing something he shouldn’t, like Seonghwa was witnessing a part of him that shouldn’t be seen. The part that had clawed its way from the bottom, that tore through anyone who stood in his way, that refused to give up unseen and unheard. 

When he stepped past the body and into the cobbled road he couldn’t help but glance at Seonghwa’s face, unsure what he was hoping to see. What he got was a flat mouth and deep brown eyes, and an unexpected hand on his lower back. 

“I’m glad that went relatively smoothly, you did a good job. Let’s head back now, we need to discuss the plans for tomorrow.”

There was a special kind of delight of someone who accepts your darkness unquestioned. Who looks your monsters in the eye, no fear in sight. Hongjoong wonders if he will be able to do the same, when he finally sees all that power in one man’s hands.

On the outside he just offers a small smile, and nods his head before turning to the right.

….

They had gotten up before dawn that morning to start their hike, both to sneak away before any questions could be asked and to capture as much daylight as they could. The whole thing didn’t look too far down, and if Seonghwa was being hopeful he thought they might make it to the bottom before high noon. They both had pretty much everything they would need in their packs already, although they didn’t have much in terms of warmth. Seonghwa was betting on the fact that they would only have to spend one night there at most, but one never knows. 

Hongjoong had been quiet all day, and Seonghwa wasn’t sure what to make of it. Was it old demons that haunted him? Or was it just a time where he had nothing to say? Either way he looked contemplative, and Seonghwa was not opposed to a little bit of silence. Truthfully it felt like they had been rushing through life since they met at that tavern, paranoia pushing them from the back and fool’s gold spurring them forward. Seonghwa knew there was no real turning back, so he kept stepping onward. 

They reached the bottom just as clouds began to cover the sun, and Seonghwa paused to look around. There was a river in front of them, and a choice of left or right. Seonghwa had tried to subtly inquire about the mine's wearabouts from the innkeeper last night, and if his vague pointing had been accurate then it should be southwest ie to their left. It was a shaky basis for a potentially crucial decision, but it was also all he had. 

He gestured Hongjoong to follow and brushed creeping vines out of his way, a damp breeze hitting his face. The smell of old earth filled his lungs, reminding him of times when he was young and small, playing in his garden like it was a world unexplored. They cut to the other side over slippery stones, the rapids brushing past his pant’s leg. 

After an hour of trailing through the forested terrain, Seonghwa was already thinking through options for where to stay if they had to spend the night. Returning empty handed was not an option, they had already raised a little suspicion in this quiet town, and he couldn’t hold out for a second chance. He raised his foot once more before he felt a tug on his shoulder, and an excited ‘Seonghwa!’ from his companion.

His eyes followed where the painted nail pointed, and he saw a dark opening in the rock up ahead. There was a good chance it was just what they were looking for. He picked up the pace until they were both at the beginning of the black hole, and reached in his bag for his lantern. He took one more step but was stopped once again by Hongjoong’s grip on his arm, looking back to see something rather tender.

Hongjoong’s eyes were a little unfocused and his tone was plain when he uttered a “be careful”, but Seonghwa felt a rush of warmth all the same. He was so unused to the sentiment that he just nodded before swiveling back towards the cave. He cursed his own stiff nature, and hoped that Hongjoong knew he appreciated the gesture even when he didn’t say. 

The walls of the cave were narrow, their stone as black as ink. Warbled in was streaks of blue, topaz slicing through the dreary darkness. There were several turns but no splits yet, until they reached a part where Seonhwa had to crouch to continue. There were three options in front of them, one pointing down and another narrowing up. The middle was similar to the one they were on, and Seonghwa could freely admit he didn’t really have a good idea on which to take. Still, he spoke.

“We cannot know for sure but maybe it's best to just keep going on the path that’s the same as this one, that way at least it would take less energy.”

Hongjoong shook his head, his hand on his hip and his eyes inspecting each path. 

“I disagree. Remember what the innkeeper said? People have explored these caves before because of the legend. If it was easy I’m sure they would have found what we are looking for already. So that means wherever it is, it's in a place no one has either thought or dared to go. The best path then, is downward.”

Seonghwa had gotten here partially because of trusting Hongjoong’s reasoning skills, and he wasn’t about to doubt him now. So down they went, the cave’s getting steeper and pressing in tighter. Seonghwa wasn’t sure if it was just his imagination but it felt hard to breath down here, especially as they walked deeper every step. It got harder to move through the hole, at some parts they had to rock climb down stone walls and shimmy tight corridors. 

They came to a point where there was nothing more than a long tunnel ahead, and Seonghwa already knew he wasn’t going to fit. He had never been terribly flexible in the first place, and his shoulders were simply too broad to squeeze in. Hongjoong just barely made it, and Seonghwa could see him peeking through the other side. 

They both knew he would have to continue on without him, and face whatever lie ahead alone. Seonghwa nodded, and spoke in a low tone. 

“Be careful.”

Hongjoong’s smile was almost sly, and he gave him a salute before he left. Seonghwa sat down and closed his eyes, knowing he could do nothing but trust now. Time seemed to pass but he could barely feel it, everything and nothing on his mind. He tried to deny the worry that gnawed at his gut but he knew he was fooling himself least of all. But he had faith in Hongjoong’s abilities and his word. 

There was something that kept catching his eye however, a divot that seemed unusual on the wall. It was a bunch of crumbling rocks, and they looked loosely together. Perhaps out of simply wanting something to do, he began to remove them slowly.

By the time he heard a stirring on the other side of the hole again he was sure it must have been another hour, although the long time staring at rocks with only a flickering light might have tricked him. He heard more than saw Hongjoong crawl through the space, and land in a squat with a solid thump of his feet. Seonghwa reached out a hand and saw the sour look on Hongjoong’s face, now sure that he knew the answer before it was said. 

“A dead end. A  _ fucking  _ dead end after all that.” 

Hongjoong didn’t yell, but his frustration was evident, and in a bid to take his mind off things Seonghwa moved to show him what he uncovered. Which really, wasn’t much.

“Well it is likely nothing important, but I did find one more place to go in this tunnel. There were some rocks that looked shaky here, and they were covering a small opening. One I could probably even make it through this time.”

Hongjoong blinked a little at the whiplash of emotions and then craned his head, inspecting the new hole that indeed lay to their right. He looked hesitant to start on another one of these errands, but they both weren’t here because they gave up quickly. 

“Okay then, lets go.”

They moved through the opening into a larger pathway, this time Seonghwa before Hongjoong. The rocks slid slightly beneath their feet, and Seonghwa stepped carefully to avoid any big movements of stone. Hongjoong moved to his side as the tunnel opened up wider, coming to end in a small natural room. Seonghwa froze as he spotted something in the corner, a flash of white against the noir walls. Hongjoong must have seen it too as they walked step in step to inspect it, pushing aside a few rocks to see better. 

It was bone. Yellowed ivory that was chipped into scattered pieces, unrecognizable and yet completely distinct. Seonghwa didn’t bother with the idea of leaving the dead lying peacefully, not when there might be the key to everything in this dead man’s palm. They both tossed stones as they uncovered more and more of the figure, until they saw their first spec of gold. Seonghwa picked up the last lump around it and Hongjoong yanked it from its tomb, flipping it over to see the cracked surface of a gold compass. 

The breath left Seonghwa’s lungs all at once, and when he looked into Hongjoong’s eyes they were shaking. Seonghwa clung his hand onto Hongjoong’s arm, the air silent as it all became real at once. Their foolish errand, their crazy dream, their hope against hope. It was here, it was solid, it was possible like never before. Hongjoong wrapped a desperate arm around his shoulder and Seonghwa closed his eyes so tight he saw stars, taking in a deep breath. 

Slowly their bodies relaxed and released one another, both sporting broad grins. They shared a nod, and that was all that they needed to get going. The travel back up seemed so much shorter than the climb in, the light at the end of the tunnel as bright as the gates of heaven. 

The sun seemed low in the gray sky, probably only an hour or two before sunset left, but Seognhwa didn’t care. He felt unstoppable, like his life had come together all for this moment. They both stepped out into the fresh air and shared a long knowing look, disbelief and relief passing between them. 

Hongjoong’s had his hand in his pocket but it was obvious he was still gripping the compass tight, veins creeping up his shaking arm. Seonghwa knew he would be the same if it was in his hand, and he swallowed before starting to walk again. They had barely made it to the tree line but Seonghwa couldn’t help but keep looking back every step. It's not that he suspected Hongjoong would flee or anything, simply that he felt it must all be a dream. Things were amazing, they were magical, they were spectacular- then it began to rain. 

More like it poured. The rain was in sheets rather than droplets, dousing them in enough water to soak them straight to the bone. They both turned and fled back to the mouth of the cave, scattering like animals from the dense flood. Finally they got under the cover of the rock, now shivering and dripping onto the stone floor. Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong as the man tried to blink away the water falling into his eye, and shook his hair with his nose scrunched in displeasure. 

Then Seonghwa burst into laughter. Loud, snorting, squeaky laughter. So much that he doubled over, so hard that he tried to catch his breath and failed. Hongjoong was just staring at him with wide eyes, mouth parted and body pushed a little forward.

“What in the hell is so funny?”

Seonghwa waited until he could get a hold of himself, trying several times to speak clearly before he forced in two deep breaths and opened his mouth again. 

“This, us. I mean look at us Hongjoong, two men of great importance who just made quite possibly the biggest discovery of our life, and we look like two grumpy drowned cats. If God isn’t funny then I don’t know who is.” 

Hongjoong paused, and then broke out into giggles of his own, a fond look on his face as he stared up. 

“Yeah I guess that's true. You really did sound like a cat just now huh, like one that was probably on the brink of dying.” 

Seonghwa just smiled at the playful tease, raising a dark eyebrow. 

“Oh so you didn’t just shake the water out of your hair like a newly bathed kitten?”

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, and in a delightful contrast scooted closer until he rested his head on Seonghwa’s shoulder. His face was warm against Seonghwa’s skin, and suddenly his body felt much hotter. Hongjoong nuzzled in, truly like a playful cat that wanted affection, and Seonghwa didn’t even think before he brought up a hand to pet through his damp hair. Hongjoong spoke up next, his voice almost a whine.

“All this pain, all this power, and all it takes is a solid downpour to get us melting into puddles.” 

Seonghwa gave out a chuckle, still running his fingers through tangled strands. The two men watched the rain from the safety of their little cave, and the moment felt quiet despite the rush in front of them. 

As the weather seemed to lessen into a drizzle, Hongjoong picked up his head and rubbed his eyes. Seonghwa stretched his arms as well, and turned to tell Hongjoong they might not make it back before dark. Just as he moved though he felt something terrible. An instinct that had never failed him thrummed, like the pluck of a string that jolted straight through his nervous system. 

He reached out a hand and yanked Hongjoong forward, just in time for an arrow to sail right by them, landing with a bang on the stone next to their head. 

  
  



	9. Golden Hour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow its funny how I forget about this fic for forever and the pick it up and get obsessed LOL. I am honestly loving how this story is going and I hope y'all like it too! Thank you to everybody who left comments last chapter, I read them again to get me motivated to start writing this and they were still so sweet :'). Y'all really keep me going! Also just a warning- for sure some graphic violence in this so beware.

Seonghwa could only catch a glimpse of silver from the trees before another shot flew past his face, the instincts long buried in his bones flaring as he spun out of the way. Hongjoong leapt to the side to cover his body in the cave and now held his knife in his fist. They shared a flash of desperate eye contact before Seonghwa sprung forward. 

A wall of fire burst from his palms instantly turning the next arrow to ash. The heat of it burned at his numb cheeks, his attack a big enough distraction to get him to the cover of a large oak. He glanced right and left with a jerk of his head but the world remained skeptical calm, only gray and green greeting him. 

He sunk low until his knees almost touched the mud, his breath rapid even as his hands remained perfectly steady. Small drops of rain slid onto his forehead in rhythm, their beat the only sign of time passing. His ears were keenly tuned to the world, every rustle of wind and slide of mud accounted for. But the silence could only last so long. 

A rustle and then a body was out in the open air, suspended just an instant before crashing into the mouth of the cave. Hongjoong’s arm swung up and met the blade with his own, and their bodies tangled in battle. Seonghwa bite his tongue and bid his time, his entire body tense. Hongjoong’s foot shoved forward and the man flew back just an inch, but that’s all Seonghwa needed.

His fingers twisted together as energy launched through his arm, spiraling until it burned through the back of the man’s chest. Immediately a figure emerged from his right with flames already sizzling through the rain right towards him. He blocked with his own blast and leapt to the side, firing off heat as his opponent danced around it. 

Out of the corner of his eye he caught a flit of black and red as Hongjoong launched himself at another masked figure, but Seonghwa knew he had to keep his focus on his own front. Seonghwa observed as the man lowered himself into a coiled squat, his technique flawless even on the rough terrain. Seonghwa prepared his own stance, and the world stilled before it exploded in red. 

Leaves sizzled off the trees around them, flames running through the green branches until they crumpled into blackened char on the ground. Their shins slammed into each other as strikes were blocked and then tried again, small burns and deep bruises the only progress either were making. Seonghwa hadn’t faced someone this skilled in a long time, their movements mirroring his own.

He burned the dirt and then kicked a chunk towards his enemy, but the man in black was too quick to fall for that, dodging then pressing his whole body in to slam Seonghwa against a trunk. Seonghwa whipped his foot out with a bolt inferno to force the man back and give himself enough time to recover to strike with the slap of his palm. All he got was a grunt and a returning hit, both of them now completely out of breath. 

They sprung together once more, their limbs fluid yet their hits as potent as the fangs of a viper. The world was burning around them but they never lost sight of each other through the smoke. Seonghwa spun to give a high kick and felt his foot slip underneath him. It was such a simple detail, the water on the ground adding just a bit more torque than he was counting on. But so was life. You could train a thousand hours, fight a hundred battles, and all it takes is one moment of bad luck. 

He tried to recover his stance but it was a little late, a fist of fire already closing in on his face. And so that would have been his fate, had a shard of ice not come flying into the arm poised in front of him. Seonghwa only allowed himself one blink of shock before he launched forward and crushed a fist into the man’s chest, pushing until the body flew back with a few sickening pops.

The man’s back shattered against the rough bark, his mask cracking from the top of his head to the bottom of his chin. Half of its porcelain exterior tumbled to the mud, and Seonghwa stared into the fierce eyes he had gazed upon a hundred times before. He froze, body poised for a last strike but his mind unable to stutter forward. 

“Surprised to see me General? I sure as hell was shocked to see  _ you.  _ All that talk of protecting us, all the men who looked up to you- for you to end up betraying us  _ all!”  _

Seonghwa opened his mouth to speak but no words seemed ready to leave his mouth, his teeth grinding against each other as the rain began to pound on the ground. The sheer fury in the pupils that dug into his face burned deep into Seonghwa’s soul, branding his throat in hot iron. A shimmer of steel forced him to throw up a hand to protect himself, but there wasn’t any point to it after all.

The knife sunk into the man’s own throat, his blood sinking into the earth as the rain washed it down into its depths. Seonghwa’s arm sagged back to his side, his vision filled with pools of red as it leaked down to his feet. A rush of water ran down his scalp and poured off of his nose, his body slightly trembling in the frigid flood. 

The man almost looked peaceful, sprawled out under the tree with his hand reached out like it was waiting for an offering. Seonghwa would have given him his beating heart, carved out of his ribs like a gift to the gods in a prayer for mercy. The slide of chilled fingers weaving through his own barely registered, even as he noticed a brighter red in the corner of his vision. 

The red of Hongjoong’s hair was different from the color on the ground however. It was vibrant where the other was rusted, warm where the other lay cold. Seonghwa had always held a disdain for the color, ever since he had to put on his own uniform for the first time. It haunted him. Splashes of crimson were an omen of doom, and dark maroon cloth made it hard to distinguish what was dye and what was not. 

Yet he couldn’t resent its presence this time, not when it meant Hongjoong was next to him. They stood there a while together, until the places their skinned touched grew warm. The rain lessened slowly and Seonghwa felt like he could hear the world once more. He took in a deep breath, the smell of iron and damp earth filling his lungs, and he let it all out. 

He gently released his hold on Hongjoong’s hand and then stepped over to where his pack lay on the ground. He sifted through a few items before gripping the dark blue handle he wanted. As he turned Hongjoong observed him carefully, his deep eyes like pools of still water softly lapping at the shore. Seonghwa moved passed him till he reached the ground right in front of the tree, and struck down.

His small shovel dug into the loose dirt, and he quietly set the pile aside. Again he pushed into the willing earth, and then again. He noticed movement as Hongjoong slid back into the forest, but he kept his focus on the long task ahead of him. The hole grew bigger and his shoulders began to ache, his palm stinging from friction. Still he hollowed the land, shifting forward once he was done with the lower portion. 

Seonghwa wasn’t sure how much time had passed when he finished, but the rain had slowed into a drizzle and the sun was golden in the western sky. As he stood up his knees creaked, fingers pulsing as he finally loosened his grip. He glanced to his left and was met with the sight of Hongjoong standing solemnly to the side, in his hands a spiny light green plant and wide white flowers. 

They were Lilies and Thistle to be exact, the symbols of mourning in a fire nation burial. Seonghwa just stared at them, swallowing the bittersweet acid crawling up his throat. He slowly revolved around to face the scene he had prepared once more. A long blink and then he moved. He lifted the body tenderly, inching it towards the pit until it was swallowed whole. 

He turned his head and reached out an upturned hand. Hongjoong stepped forward until he placed the bouquet into Seonghwa’s grip, eyes downcast as Seonghwa carefully set the assortment into the grave right on top of the man’s head.

After Seonghwa scooped up the first handful of dirt and poured it back in, Hongjoong lowered himself down to do the same. Gradually they returned the soil to its rightful place, the ground completely even by the time the last rays of light left the treetops. 

After it was over, Seonghwa rose and straightened his spine before curling into a bow. It was a final gift, the last thing one could give the dead was respect. He lifted his head and Hongjoong followed, their eyes meeting for just a moment before Seonghwa moved once more. He grabbed the pack that was waiting for him and began guiding them slowly in the direction of the river, both of them careful while trekking through the dark. 

He heard the rush of the stream before he saw it, feet soon sinking into the sandy bank. The area was clear enough for a small camp, and it would simply have to do. He grabbed a small knife and cut off a few branches on the closest tree, paring them down to the right shape. He then gathered them into the circle of rocks Hongjoong had already made and lit them aflame. 

In the light of the fire it was easier to navigate setting up their small shelter, which was mostly just two sleeping mats and a tarp. Hongjoong pressed the liquid out of the ground as much as he could, but it was difficult to control water in another element. In the end he settled for slightly damp, and moved on to gather their food. 

A large pot of rice and a little stew later, they both started preparing for bed. Seonghwa was the first to start stripping out of his cold clothes, baring himself with little regard for his audience. Hongjoong was quick to turn away but followed suit, too exhausted to try and dry anything manually. 

He quickly slid himself into the mat and Seonghwa soon followed. The air was quiet beyond the crackle of the fire. Tucked in their tent it was effectively pitch black, not even the stars shining on their faces. Seonghwa could hear Hongjoong’s breath as it stuttered out of his body and knew the night would only grow colder from here. 

“Come here. Water benders run cold, if you stay there you will freeze.”

Hongjoong let out a small gasp, probably at the sound of his voice after it had been so silent. There was a pause, then a hesitant scuffle, and then a gust of chilled air as Hongjoong laid down. A moment passed with the redhead still halfway out of the bedroll and Seonghwa grew impatient. 

He wrapped an arm around Hongjoong’s waist and hauled him in, ignoring his squawk and grabbing the edge of the cover to wrap them up tight. Their skin was fully pressed into each other with Seonghwa’s hand spread over the soft expanse of Hongjoong’s lower back. His leg was tucked in between Hongjoong’s own, their bodies in a warm tangle. 

Hongjoong buried his hot face into Soenghwa’s neck, no doubt embarrassed by their position. Normally Seonghwa might understand, but tonight he had a lot on his mind. He couldn’t deny that it was nice though-- holding someone this intimately. The way Hongjoong felt against him soothed something he didn’t know was tense.

Incrementally Hongjoong’s body also relaxed, his arm coming up to wrap around Seonghwa’s shoulders. He began to rub a thumb along Seonghwa’s bunched up neck, his fingertips lightly scratching at the top of the spine. His hair was still damp against Seonghwa’s cheek, and Seonghwa wondered if it was still as vibrant as it seemed a few hours ago. 

“Seonghwa?”

He hummed, letting Hongjoong know he was listening.

“I don’t know if this is odd, but when I am facing a difficult time or waking up from nightmares, I ask Yunho to sing a lullaby from my mother. If it would bring you any comfort I could sing for you now.” 

Seonghwa closed his dry eyes and held onto a long breath, letting it out so slow it almost whistled. He nodded with his face still pressed against Hongjoong’s own, so he knew it would be felt. Hongjoong just let out a quiet okay and seemed to take a moment to gather himself.

“ _ Lie here now darling and remember our song, _

_ Cry forever and know I’ve been here all along. _

_ The gentle fire burns bright for you, _

_ The kind water will part for you, _

_ The solid earth will cradle you, _

_ The wistful air will carry you, _

_ And I will hold you too.  _

_ Life may blow you west or north or even east, _

_ But know I will always protect you while you sleep.” _

It was a simple rhyme with an even more basic tune, but it's well worn notes brought a sense of calm and caring. It had been so long since Seonghwa had let himself be soothed, since his projection of strength and surety could be dropped long enough to show that he needed it. The iron gates on his heart had been cracked long ago, but now he could feel them gently swing open. 

It wasn’t even painful, as they pivoted on rusty hinges. In fact it felt like something warm was trickling in instead, filling small cracks with molten gold. Maybe it was this new opening that prompted him to speak next, to give with no hesitation.

“His name was Rehun.” 

Hongjoong’s thumb stilled for a second and then rubbed even deeper.

“He had come to me when he was only 15. He shouldn’t have even been allowed in but no one cared, the least of all my general above me. I was only captain then, just barely exploring my lightning technique. But I was still one of the best fighters in the legion, and thus tasked with picking a protegee.”

Seonghwa counted Hongjoong’s breathes against his neck and let it ground him, continuing on with the old battered story. 

“He was so  _ hungry _ . You have to understand I had never seen that look in anyone's eye, the desire to live so badly you’d kill for it. I couldn’t turn away. So I chose him, despite the whispers and the protests over ‘picking the street rat’, I refused anyone but that boy. I wanted to give him something to live for. And so I taught him, beating the basics into his body- molding him into the fighter I knew he could be.”

Seonghwa could picture him now, the rigid set of his jaw and the bright color of his flame.

“He was a good kid honestly. He was the life of the party when he wanted to be, belting out any song with little regard to actual ability. Dealt a hard hand but never gave up on making his way forward, even sent most of his money back to a sick aunt who had three kids she could barely feed. He was truly like a younger brother, even if I was never as kind as I could have been.” 

Seonghwa let his chin tuck behind Hongjoong’s ear, breathing in the scent of rain and gentle musk. 

“Then the king must have heard about his abilities, General Hao probably bragging as usual, and so he got sent an offer. Before I knew it he was packing up to go, our last conversation the night before he left. He had waited to tell me, I think he wanted it to be a nice surprise. He was so proud. God  _ damn _ it, he was so happy. He just wanted to make a name for himself, to prove he was worth something. But I told him he was an idiot. I cursed him for taking the position, stating that all he would be was the king’s dog.” 

The memory should get less painful, but it never did. The bitterness at his own regrets still stinging his tongue, the hurt twist of Rehun’s face still as clear as it was in that lantern light years ago. 

“He never spoke to me again. He left early that morning, out of my sight forever. I tried to say something before he went but he got up before the sun even rose, maybe just to make sure I couldn’t. I wanted to keep tabs on him but he was always involved in the kind of business the king doesn’t want shared around. I had almost forgotten what his voice even sounded like… I suppose that’s one thing I won’t have to worry about now.” 

The fire was still gently popping, and it sounded extra loud in the quiet now. Eventually Hongjoong let out a long sigh, hand shifting up to hold softly at the back of Seognhwa’s neck. His voice was hushed, tone softly lit at the ends.

“Seonghwa, I know it sounds obvious, but it bears repeating. You are just a human being. Flawed, unsure, and stumbling through like the rest of us. I know for years you’ve been playing god for those who need something to have faith in, but here in the middle of the night at least you must remember that you will never be absolute. You spoke wrong then, but your heart never strayed, and in the end that’s all we can hope for. The consequences are not up to us.”

Seonghwa swallowed something deep, something that was threatening to consume him whole. He tucked both arms even tighter around Hongjoong’s body, and gave a small nod. Hongjoong pressed himself closer in response, their bodies so compressed Seonghwa could feel their hearts begin to beat in sync. Somewhere between the next worry and the gentle reassurance in his arms, Seonghwa drifted off to a light slumber. 

…

  
  


They made it back to town just a little after the sun fully rose, their dilapidated appearances not attracting much attention as they passed through the main section of town. They reached their small inn and slinked up the steps, packs falling heavy from their shoulders once they got to their room. 

Hongjoong collapsed onto the duvet cover while Seognghwa wasted no time to gather his stuff to shower. He had looked at his muddy clothes with such disdain a few hours before, so Hongjoong was hardly surprised to see him eager to clean up. 

Hongjoong starred up into the pale pink ceiling above him, eyes running along the cracks in the plaster as he tried to sort out his own mind. Yesterday had been like a huge wave, emotions crashing into him as the fear, elation, and sorrow washed over his head. 

Flashes of it came back to him now. The look of trust and desperation he shared with Seognhwa before climbing deeper in the cave, their embrace of delight while the compass pressed coolly into his palm, the aching tone of Seonghwa’s voice ringing against his ear in the dark night. Two days ago felt like a lifetime. 

All Hongjoong knew was that when he woke up still engulfed in Soenghwa’s embrace his body was too hot, his limbs felt grimy, and he had not been so comfortable in years. Maybe the last time really was just the vague impression of his mother’s hold, still too young to know the cold of the world outside. 

He never thought he’d feel that kind of safety again. His heart pounded a loud beat inside his ribs, and he placed his hand down just to keep it inside his chest. A heat was boiling in his stomach, vapor scratching at his throat. He swallowed but he knew the fix was only temporary, no amount of water would smother this burn. 

Soenghwa emerged from the bathroom slowly as steam poured out from the door behind him. He jerked his head back to indicate Hongjoong should enter next, and Hongjoong decided in that moment that he would rather obey than speak. He gathered his items and washed up carefully, giving himself a good scrub in case this was his last one for a while. 

When he opened the door into the room once more Seonghwa had already laid out their map, eyes shifting up from its contents to meet Hongjoong’s own. 

“I think it's time. You should get- it out.”

Hongjoong wasn’t sure if it was paranoia of being overheard or slight disbelief that kept Seonghwa from saying the word out loud, but either way he understood. He slipped his hand into his pocket and walked over, slowly pulling out the aged gold item.

They both took a moment to just really look at it, the etched metal showing a simple lotus on its tarnished front. He pushed the button at the top and it flipped open, revealing a red dial pointing a little left of north. Immediately Seonghwa got to mapping out the direction, starting with the point they were facing and then drawing a line at the same angle of the compass. 

It wasn’t long before his pencil tip hit a small island, the only land in the direct path of the line. Hongjoong gripped his fist tight, eyes unable to peel off the speck that might hold everything for them. Seonghwa glanced up and they shared an understanding, both men standing up and quickly sorting out their belongings. 

They wasted not one second before getting out the door, an urgency to their steps they hadn’t had before. They made their way through the lobby until Seonghwa paused, turning to the lady who had been at the desk every day since their arrival.

“Excuse me, but do you know any boats for hire around here? One that would take us to where we need to go quickly?” 

She blinked a few times, perhaps not used to them sticking around long enough to ask many questions, and then spoke in a sugar sweet tone. 

“Oh yes dear there are a few, but I’m not sure if they are at the docks today. Can I ask where you're going? That might narrow the options.”

Seonghwa tilted his head in consideration but seemed to deem the risk worth it. 

“It's a small island north of here, I believe it is called Sangal.” 

Her eyes widened and Hongjoong felt a spike of fear shoot up his spine, his stance already lowering. 

“Oh how wonderful! You’re just in luck then, there is a decent sized Water Tribe vessel that should be headed there this afternoon. Some recruiting ship out trying to loop young boys into this messy battle, you know they type. I’m sure if you paid them a decent tip though they would be willing to take you along!”

Seonghwa nodded politely and thanked her while Hongjoong tried to relax his body enough to do the same. He handed the lady their keys and then they pushed through the doors for the last time, moving down the road towards the docks.

Seonghwa didn’t look at him when he spoke, tone low as his eyes glanced around their surroundings.

“What are the chances you will be recognized if we get on this ship?”

Hongjoong hummed and stepped over a large rock sticking out from the gravel. 

“Does it matter? We aren’t getting anything better than this, and after our last encounter it's clear we aren’t safe to stay here.” 

“It may not affect our decision, but it certainly would be good to be prepared.”

Hongjoong sighed, pushing a rough branch out of the way as he judged the next step to take.

“I don’t know. If it’s a recruiting vessel then they are bound to have some men who served before, but the chances that they know me by face isn’t huge. They would have heard of me though that’s for sure.” 

Seonghwa nodded to no one, feet finding the first wood plank of the pier.

“Then we will simply have to face it when we get there.”

They cut across the creaky platform until they spot a small boat with the Water Tribe crest on its bow, a few men hoisting boxes over the side to prepare it to sail. Seonghwa approached the first man with caution, although he really looks like no more than a boy. 

“Excuse me, I would like to speak to the captain of this ship.”

The boy just blinked at him and slid his wide eyes up and down Seonghwa’s body before he pointed to the man standing directly above them. Immediately they both glance up to see a burly man of maybe 40 staring them down, a few scars running along his wrist to his elbow. 

“And what can I do for you huh?”

Hongjoong tried to stay tucked under his hood as the man inspected them, letting Seonghwa do all the talking for now. 

“We wish to reach the island of Sangal and have heard you were headed that way, if you are willing we would pay quite a bit to come along.”

The man rubbed at his graying mustache, his arms resting on his knee as he leaned over the edge of the ship. His deep black eyes lingered on Hongjoong a little long, enough for the muscles in his back to begin to seize. 

After a long pause he simply flicked his eyes back to Seonghwa and shrugged his shoulders before picking up a box and yelling out to them.

“Eh give me a hundred pence and it's a deal. We have a bunch of extra beds anyway for new lads to join the cause, and the island is only two days' travel away.”

Hongjoong released his breath slow, the constant tension of this day reminding him of the battlefield he left not long ago. Seonghwa didn’t hesitate before climbing up the rope on the side of the boat and Hongjoong followed him like a shadow. They sat down on a crate out of the way of the working crew, several men hauling up the last of the wares. As the final member climbed aboard, two benders stood on their designated platforms at opposite ends and began pushing and pulling the water. 

The man-made current pulled them out of the harbor and into the open ocean once more, blue swallowing the island behind them until it gulped it whole. Hongjoong kept quiet, pulling on his dark linen pants as he tucked his knees to his chest. He knew every move he made could be the one that gave them away, so he barely breathed. 

Seonghwa was a little more bold but never said another word, both of them hunkered down as the sun beat on their bodies. Salt water splashed at their faces, the humidity of the sea making Hongjoong’s clothes stick to his skin. It wasn’t until the sun had almost sunken that Seonghwa pulled on his arm to leave.

They slid through the main cabin doors and Seonghwa quietly dropped off their allotted money in the captain’s chamber. When he was done they wandered together in search of an unoccupied room. The crew passed them with vague interest and suspicion, and by Hongjoong’s count there were probably only 20 men total on the ship. 

In the very back of the ship there was an empty room with a few stiff looking bunks, the whole thing made more claustrophobic by the steel walls around it. Seonghwa set off his pack right next to the farthest bunk from the door, pulling out some hard jerky they had bought a few days before.

Hongjoong closed the door tight but noted there was no lock to find and he was sure now that he wouldn’t get much sleep tonight. It had all seemed a little easy and a little rocky, like they were balanced securely on a tightrope that was a 100 feet off the ground. 

Seonghwa offered him an antiseptic rinse after their small meal. It would have to do, they certainly weren’t granted the luxury of a real bathroom here. Hongjoong peeled off his layers and made to stand but Seonghwa held onto his arm. He fell gently where Seonghwa pushed him, back pressed against the wall as Seonghwa shifted to face the main part of the room.

It helped him stay hidden from anyone who might peek in, and kept him safe from a direct attack, but Hongjoong wondered if that was the only reason Seonghwa insisted he slept next to him that night. No matter the intent, Hongjoong was grateful, for the security and for the warm presence in this cold unknown room. 

He pressed his chilled face into Seonghwa’s spine and let himself breathe in his scent, a hint of gentle embers in the air. Hongjoong let his shoulders curl in, the thin blanket just enough to keep him from shivering. He drifted into a relaxed state, not quite sleep but enough to rest, unaware of the dark crackling clouds that lay on the horizon. 


End file.
